Tag Archives: weird

Stuff I actually dream about

In my last post I talked about the things I like to daydream about.
But what do I dream about when I’m fast asleep? Let’s find out…

Monday I dreamed that Jessica Simpson was coming out with a line of butter candies. The flavors she had were: buttered toast, buttered popcorn, hot buttered rum and baked potato with butter. She needed my help to come up with the 5th flavor. I suggested buttered waffles.

Tuesday I dreamed that I worked at the Mad Men offices. I was going through everyone’s files to find out what their salaries were. I’m sneaky that way.

Wednesday I dreamed that I was hanging out with Lynda Carter/Wonder Woman. She was really impressed that I had a gold ring with three purple stones (I do not really have a gold ring with three purple stones).

Thursday I dreamed that I was a consumer reporter analyzing pool rafts.

Friday I dreamed that I couldn’t open my high school locker. It seemed I spent all night trying to open my combination lock. I hate those kinds of dreams. (In high school my locker combination was 10-16-38).

Saturday I dreamed that I was in charge of refreshments for the Honey Boo Boo airshow (she would jump out of an airplane and fly to the ground). I couldn’t find a dozen doughnuts, cupcakes or cookies, so I had to mix and match. It was very frustrating.

On Sunday I dreamed that I went to a party thrown by Kathy Griffin. I par-tayed until the wee hours. The next day Liam Neeson was mad at me for keeping his little boy out all night long. I guess I was supposed to be babysitting him – oops.

So what does any of this mean? Who cares. At least I didn’t dream that my teeth were falling out or that I had a mouth full of gum. My favorite dreams are flying dreams – but I rarely have those. What are some of the weird dreams you have? Let me know in comments!


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What I Don’t Like About You

Last week I listed 20 television characters I love. That means this week it’s time to list 20 characters I hate. And not “love to hate” like Pete Campbell from Mad Men or Ben from Lost. These are characters that I find annoying, lame, whiny, stupid or all of the above. It may be the way the actors are portraying them, or just the way the characters are written. Or maybe it’s the actor himself/herself. Whatever it is, they’re obnoxious and unwatchable.

Annie Romano from One Day At A Time. Overact much? YES!

Phil from Modern Family. He’s way too clownish and dopey.

Debra Messing as Grace and Molly and Julia and any other character she’s played. She is truly awful. She just seems so self aware. Another overactor.

Ivy from 90210. She’s so flat, mopey and morose. ALL the time.

Ross from Friends. What a drip.

Elmo. It’s the voice. It’s like nails on a chalkboard.

Angela Chase from My So Called Life. The angst, the awkwardness, the hair tucking behind the ear, the flannel shirts, the always hugging herself and saying “like” every other word. And how many Jordans are in your school anyway? Can’t you refer to Jordan by his first name only?

Clare Edwards from Degrassi. I’m not sure why I can’t stand Clare. Maybe it’s because she’s a drama queen. Or that she looks like a middle-aged woman in those awful school uniforms. I just know she bugs me.

Kramer from Seinfeld (sorry, Tam). Too weird, too slapsticky. Not my cup of tea.

Jennifer Love Hewitt as anyone in anything. It all started with her character on Party of Five. All that “cutesy” acting and the going around with her sleeves pulled over her hands drove me nuts. Cleavage + acting cutesy = bad actress!

Will Schuester on Glee. He’s so smarmy. And waaaay too into the Glee kids. I might hate him more than Sue Sylvester does.

Hope on Thirtysomething. Never happy. What a wet blanket.

Annie Camden from 7th Heaven. She always seemed so annoyed and kind of bitchy- with a little bit of Church lady thrown in for good measure.

Ally McBeal. Ugh. I couldn’t even make it through one episode.

Susan from Desperate Housewives. I detest her “adorable klutzy” schtick.

Dawn Summers from Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Whiny, petulant and useless.

Smurfette. That voice. I can’t smurfing stand it.

Ellis from Smash. He’s such a sneaky little weasel. And not in a fun way.

Declan Porter from Reven8e. His hair is way too big for his body. I call him the human Q-tip. He’s useless as far as I’m concerned. Every time he appears I want to shake my fist at the television (you called it, Craig).

Lori from The Walking Dead. She thinks all the women should be cookin’ and doing laundry – not kicking zombie butt. And she can’t even keep track of her own kid. Or drive!

So which characters make you want to throw something at the screen? Let me know in comments!

It’s The Thursday Four!

My new haircut looks something like this.

Much like the ‘Friday Five’, the ‘Thursday Four’ is an exploration of great things.  …except there are four things instead of five.  …and it’s Thursday and not Friday.  …and it doesn’t really have the same ring as ‘Friday Five’.  OH WELL!  This week Michelle M. and I got together (figuratively, not literally) to present these four great things to you.  Read ’em and weep, suckers!

1. Grooming myself! (and having other people groom me.)  This week I trimmed my beard really short, AND got a haircut!  I look marvelous!  I’d post a photo, but I’ve gotten so fat that I hardly look like myself anymore.  (Hurray for BC&RL3!)  Either that or I’m just super lazy tonight.  ANYWAY — I love having a closely shorn head and face.  Is that weird? -Adam

Fuck you, Chris Christie!

2. Chris Christie vetoed gay marriage!  After I’ve finally gotten over the fact that he fired every teacher in NJ, I needed a new reason to hate that fat Republican fuck.  And he did not disappoint — last week he vetoed gay marriage!  Yay Chris Christie!  Now I have a reason hate you forever.  If I ever see you in person, I promise to spit on you.  People just don’t spit on each other enough these days.  Unless they need emergency lubrication — but that’s a whole ‘nother story. -Adam

3. Downton Abbey* – what a great show. Season two has just ended, but there will be a season three, and Shirley MacLaine will play Lady Cora’s mother. Yay! Here is a clip from Saturday Night Live if you haven’t been watching and would like a rundown on the show. – Michelle M.

They see me rollin', they hatin', patrollin' Tryin' to catch me ridin' dirty.

4. And look! There are Downton Abbey paper dolls, in case you’re going through DA withdrawal like me. I love the faces for the Chicken Lady, er, Dowager Countess, O’Brien’s evil soap and Mr. Pamuk. – Michelle M.

Runners up: The Good Wife*, reusable shopping bags, complaining, spending other people’s money, liquid wart remover,lazy posts, pregnant ladies, selling crap on eBay, adorably tiny bottles of diet soda, eating like a pig before BC&RL3, and hardcore gay pornography.

That’s our Thursday Four … what’s yours?

*Why isn’t this show on Our T.V. Night??

It’s Taste Test Time!

There are certain brands that I always buy or order because I think that they are superior. But am I just being blindly loyal or do I really think they are the best? The only way to know is to compare them with their competitors in a blind taste test. *Harry and I did not taste anything in the same order.

We started with the chocolate (milk chocolate). I was looking forward to this the most, but I have to say, it was too much of a good thing. They all tasted fairly similar, and none really stood out in a good (or bad) way.

Godiva
Harry: not as creamy as the others
Michelle: creamy, sweet and chocolatey tasting, but in a generic way. My second favorite.

See’s
Harry: had a nutty taste (like hazelnuts or walnuts), kinda weird
Michelle: Reminds me of walnuts, has a hint of cocoa

Ghiradelli
Harry: he thought this tasted the same as the Trader Joe’s chocolate
Michelle: Has a really sweet aftertaste, too sweet. My least favorite

Trader Joe’s
Harry: same as the Ghiradelli
Michelle: has a little bit of saltiness, a chocolate aftertaste, very sweet

Hershey
Harry: not as milky as the others, but is more chocolatey
Michelle: This is Hershey’s, maybe my favorite, has a very subtle grittiness

Cadbury
Harry: Tastes less sweet than the others
Michelle: Mellow, very sweet, tastes like a chocolate Easter bunny, has a hazelnut aftertaste

Lindt
Harry: Has a caramel taste. Not my favorite.
Michelle: Creamy and sweet, very melty in the mouth

Dove
Harry: Less milky and more chocolatey, just chocolate
Michelle: I like the texture, a little sweet, maybe the most chocolatey

And the winners?

Harry – couldn’t pick one. They all tasted alike to him.

Michelle – Hershey’s. I could identify it right off the bat (so did Harry). I’m surprised one of the higher end bars didn’t come in first.


Next up were the cheesy poofs. I know, I don’t like cheese, but it’s okay on popcorn or a poof.
I think it’s a texture thing.

Cheetos
Harry: Cheesy. Poofy. Salty. This is my favorite.
Michelle: Cheesy all the way through.

Trader Joe’s (reduced fat)
Harry: Has a mild cheesy taste
Michelle: Has a milky taste, really sticks in your teeth

Little Bear
Harry: Most bland of all. It’s like a puff of air.
Michelle: No cheese taste at all. It tastes like a corn puff.

Safeway
Harry: Saltiness upfront, Some cheesy taste. My 2nd favorite.
Michelle: Has an upfront cheesy taste, You can taste the corn, is salty, probably my favorite

Smart Puff
Harry: Almost no cheese taste, has a hint of pepper
Michelle: Is very light, dissolves quickly into nothing, has a slight hint of cheese

Which was the best?

Michelle – I picked the Safeway brand

Harry picked the Cheetos brand. And though the Smart puffs didn’t taste very cheesy at all, we liked those to snack on.


We saved the “champagne” for last (we know it’s really sparkling wine, but we haven’t won the lottery to splurge on 5 bottles of the real stuff. So just play along). We’re also not “champagne” people (and especially not Brut – but it was only kind I could find enough varieties of). This may explain the following results.

Woodbridge
Harry: Thought this and the Chandon tasted the same.
Michelle: Bitter, very bitter. I don’t like it.

Chandon
Harry: See above
Michelle: It’s bitter and sour, middle of the road. I don’t like it.

Korbel
Harry: Thought it was similar to the Woodbridge and Chandon, but a little mellower.
Michelle: It’s bitter and has a sour taste. It’s my 2nd least favorite. I don’t like it.

Tott’s
Harry: Has a fruity taste, It’s the most mellow of them all.
Michelle: It’s bitter, but has a fruity taste up front. I don’t like it, but it’s the best of the bunch.

Cook’s (Harry had a devil of a time getting the damn cork out of this one)
Harry: Has a skunky smell. And a skunky taste. It’s my least favorite.
Michelle: Is bitter. Has a weird taste, Ew. I don’t like it. It’s my least favorite.

And the winners?

Harry – The Tott’s.

Michelle – They were all gross, but if I had to pick the least disgusting, it would be the Tott’s.

Do you have any ideas of how to make our leftover “champagne” more drinkable? Let us know in the comments and join us next time in the test kitchen as we taste the letter “T”!

Tam’s Twitter Adventures











It’s Taste Test Time!

There are certain brands that I always buy or order because I think that they are superior. But am I just being blindly loyal or do I really think they are the best? The only way to know is to compare them with their competitors in a blind taste test. So Harry and I decided to do just that.

We started with citrus sodas.

We tested them blindfolded to get the full soda experience.


Here is what we thought:


7up:

Michelle– it was okay – it was more limey/citrusy than the others
Harry – very sweet with a lemon/limey taste

SunDrop:
Michelle– did not like at all – it had a chemical, artificial taste
Harry – had more of an upfront sugary taste

Mello Yello:
Michelle – supersweet and articial
Harry – too sugary – not happy with that one

Sierra Mist:

Michelle – has a weird aftertaste – not very citrusy
Harry – good – lemon-limey

Sprite:
Michelle – okay, I guess
Harry – sugary – not very good

So the winner was:

Michelle – Sprite

Harry – Sierra Mist

And the loser was:
Mello Yello. We both hated it.

Next up was soup – chicken noodle.

Except for the Organic brand, they all kinda looked the same.
Some definitely had bigger chunks of chicken and carrots.

Here is what we thought:

Wolfgang Puck:
Michelle – had a weird herby taste? Maybe fennel. I hate fennel.
Harry – some saltiness, decent flavors, good

Progresso:

Michelle – had a canned taste and a sweetness – like caramelized onions
Harry – had a bright taste

Healthy Choice:

Michelle – watery, no flavor, tasteless, needs LOTS of salt
Harry – a sharp, burnt taste, tastes like catfood, canned tuna, weird, blech

Campbell’s:

Michelle – had a weird taste – like dirt. It’s the worst!!
Harry – had a sharp, herb taste, pungent. It’s better than catfood.

Organic:
Michelle – alright. The chicken was dry
Harry – the chicken was big, not as salty. The flavors come through.

And the winner was:

Soup in a box! We both chose the Organic brand

*Of course, the best chicken soup is my own not in the running homemade
(even when I forget to add in the celery).


The loser was:

Michelle – Campbell’s. The next day we got this coupon in the mail.
Maybe I should ask for a a refund…

Harry – Healthy Choice.

Which cracked me up because he bought a case of it at Costco.

We didn’t want to confuse out palates, so we saved salsa for last.
As you can see, Chachies is the brand we usually buy.

So how did our favorite measure up?

Rojo’s:
Michelle – good heat, too vinegary. I would not buy this.
Harry – was the spiciest heatwise – had strange tastes

Margaritaville:
Michelle – had a strong cilantro flavor. Not much heat. Was mushy in texture (except for some crunchy onion bits)
Harry – not too much tomato taste. Had more of a vinegar pickle relish taste

Chachies:
Michelle – tomatoey, nice heat. I like it.
Harry – Lots of tomato flavor. Not as hot as some of the others.

Santa Barbara:

Michelle – Had an oregano or thyme? flavor
Harry – Had some heat, a vinegar taste, muddled flavors

Sabra:
Michelle – nice, had an herby taste, not much heat, tastes like something you’d get at a restaurant
Harry – okay. More herby than the others.


So which salsa came out ahead?

Just like Joanie, we love Chachies!

And we both rated Rojo’s last. Ay caramba.

So, do you have a favorite soda, soup or salsa? And are you sure?
Maybe you should have a taste test of your own…

Make sure to join us next time in the M. test kitchen as we taste the letter P!