Tag Archives: recreation

Advice From The Expert… ASK ADAM!

It seems that people are always pestering me for my expert advice.  Truth be told, I’m awesome at everything.  I know all of the answers.  All you have to do is ask.  That’s why I’m introducing my new advice column: Advice From The Expert… Ask Adam! 


Dear Adam: What should I make for dinner tonight?
Signed, Starving For Supper

How about a nice micro-green salad topped with a simple ginger and garlic-spiked orange glazed tempeh!  Nom!


Dear Adam: I’ve always wanted a boyfriend who was young, cute, and rich. But I only got two out of three. Should I hold out for the full package or should I settle for hot but poor?
Signed, Should I Settle?

How many young, cute and rich guys do you know that aren’t characters on Gossip Girl? Be happy that you landed 2/3 of the perfect man!


Dear Adam: I know you’re not supposed to wear white after Labor Day, but what are you proscribed from wearing after Memorial Day?
Signed, Fashion Backwards

When in doubt … just wear plaid!


Dear Adam: How can I get my husband to clean his bathroom more often?
Signed, Wedded Pissed

Two words: WITHHOLD SEX. It’s the best way to get whatever you want!  That bathroom will be sparkling in no time!


Dear Adam: A couple of vegans moved in across the street. Should I be afraid of their aggressive cult-like ways?
Signed, Confused Carnivore

Trust me, vegans are just like everyone else! … but just to be safe, make sure to lock your doors and windows after dark.


Dear Adam: My younger brother is a great guy but has no self-esteem. His lack of confidence has kept him from doing anything with his life. He’s in a dead end job, hasn’t had a relationship in years, and his circle of friends has dwindles more and more each year. I want to encourage him, but he refuses to discuss his plans or goals with anyone. I just want him to be happy, but he clearly is not. What should I do?
Signed, Sibling Misery

Don’t worry, he’ll grow up eventually. Can I have his number?


Dear Adam: What the hell should I do with my life?
Signed, Miss Direction

Become a prostitute! Prostitutes make TONS of money!  You’ll be rich in not time at all!


Have a question for Adam? Email him today!

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Have You Ever … Gone Camping?!

National Camping Month was first observed in June of 2009, and helps to inspire Americans of all ages to go camping.  June is also the Obama Administration’s Great Outdoors Month, and on the 23rd of this month, families all over the United States will celebrate the Great American Backyard Campout.  Have you ever gone camping?  What have you done while camping?  Let’s find out!

The rules are simple: For each question that you answer ‘yes’ to, give yourself a single point. When you reach the end of the quiz, add up your points and post your total in the comments.

Have You Ever?!

1. Have you ever gone camping?
2. Have you ever gone camping at a campground?
3. Have you ever gone camping in a backyard?
4. Have you ever gone camping in the wilderness?
5. Have you ever slept in a tent inside your home?
6. Have you ever slept outside under the stars?
7. Have you ever started a campfire?
8. Have you ever told scary stories around a campfire?
9. Have you ever sung camp songs around a campfire?
10. Have you ever cooked food over a campfire?
11. Have you ever made s’mores around a campfire?
12. Have you ever eaten beans right out of the can while camping?
13. Have you ever eaten fish you caught while camping?
14. Have you ever been awoken by wild animals outside your tent while camping?
15. Have you ever had to run away from wild animals while camping?
16. Have you ever pooped outside?
17. Have you ever had to use something other than toilet paper after pooping outside?
18. Have you ever camped outside during a thunderstorm?
19. Have you ever ended a camping trip early because you couldn’t handle it?
20. Have you ever been bitten by a snake while camping?
21. Have you ever drank alcohol while underage, while camping?
22. Have you ever smoked pot while camping?
23. Have you ever secretly masturbated while others were sleeping in your tent?
24. Have you ever participated in a circle jerk while camping?
25. Have you ever had sex in a tent?

Tell us your total in the comments!

Thanks to Craig for his help with this post!


What does your pet say about you?

Some claim that the pet you choose can reveal a lot about your personality.
Is it true?  Let’s find out…


Mikey & Ty: English Bulldog
“People who owned utility dogs, like English bulldogs …[are] more conscientious and extroverted.” (source)


Adam: Cat
“…A sensitive fella! And he’s not only sensitive, but just loves to send you photos of his cat all day long and post them on Facebook and Twitter. I’m not sure why this is, but guys with cats are prone to such things.” (source)


Mel: French Bulldog, 3 cats (also: 2.5 alpacas and 2 Shetland sheep)
“The owners … are expressive and full of personality. These people are often overachievers because they like a dog that is a bit of a challenge.” (source) “Cats inexplicably make you stand out as more and more insane with each additional feline you possess.” (source)


Michelle M.: Parakeet
If you “…fancy a smaller variety such as a Parakeet or Canary,
you tend to be softer-spoken with a gentle demeanor.” (source)


VUBOQ: Cat
“You are easy going, but independent just like your cat; however,
you do enjoy a little snuggle time from time to time.” (source)


Craig: Wants a cat
Cat people are “more likely to be open… Open people tend to be:
curious, creative, artistic & nontraditional thinkers.” (source)


John: (had) Rabbits
“The reason your man would have a pet rabbit is because he never had one when he was a kid, and now that he’s living on his own, he’s going to finally fulfill that dream. The rabbit’s name is probably something like “Rambo”or “Killer” to make up for the fact that he’s a dude who actually owns a fluffy bunny.” (source)


Tam & The Kid: 2 Cats & a Rabbit
“If you get stressed out easily, you may be a cat person. Cat people were, as a group, 12% more neurotic than dog people. Neurotic people are: easily stressed, anxious & worriers.” (source) Rabbit owners are nice, active and are great with long-term commitments. (source) (Note: I couldn’t find a photo of Tam’s pets)


Josh: Cat & Dog
“If he owns a dog, your man is loyal and can actually commit, because owning a dog is as close to having a child as it comes.” (source) “Cat people are loners who are less religious than non-cat owners, want instant gratification, are satisfied with their jobs and are socially conscious.” (source)


Mama Polt: fluffy little dog
“…You have a desire to nurture your tiny pets. You tend to enjoy accessorizing and your pet can be an extension of that quality. Maybe you just really love cats but are in denial. In any case, you love that you can take your small pooch with you almost anywhere.  You are probably as cute and lovable as your puppy, but sometimes might be considered annoying.” (source)

One week in the life of Michelle M.

I was at a loss about what to post, so here’s a rundown of my exciting, fun-filled week.

Monday – It rained. I went grocery shopping, did laundry, ironed and watched The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills.

Tuesday – The digital arts class I wanted to take was closed, so I signed up for painting. Class started today. This is the building it’s in. We didn’t do any painting, just got our materials list. I was relieved I wasn’t the oldest one there.

Wednesday – I drove all over town looking for the supplies on my materials list. After going to four stores I finally had them all.

Thursday – Our car broke down. To the tune of $3,000. This is the rental car we’re using. In class we painted a still life of ugly bottles. We were only allowed to use burnt umber, so I ended up with an ugly brown painting of ugly bottles.

That night we went out for dinner. I had a glass of Chardonnay. The menu described it as having notes of pear, lime zest, butterscotch, honey and vanilla – none of which I could taste (wine always tastes like wine to me). Harry had a beer.

Friday – I gave blood. I wanted to have Nutter Butters, but I’m doing the non- gluten thing and had a Rice Krispie treat instead. Afterwards, we went to Wendy’s because I was craving chicken nuggets. I blame Mikey.

Saturday – I got my hair did. At least one day a month my hair does not look like a big frizzy mess. We went to Islands for dinner where I had a lovely (and potent) Mai Tai. Harry had a beer.

Sunday – We went to Las Olas for dinner (Harry had 2 beers). This is the view across the street. I love California.

Then we went to the used record store and Pizza Port for a drink. I had a hard apple cider. Harry had 2 additional beers. We rounded out the night by going to the pet store and buying a new toy for Cooper. Then I kept Adam awake ’til all hours finishing up this post.

How was your week? Was it as amazing as mine? Let me know in comments!

C&R BLACKOUT BINGO!

Congratulations to john for being the first to call C&R bingo!
Enjoy your as yet to be determined fabulous prize!

But why should all the fun (and fighting) stop here? It’s time for
BLACKOUT BINGO!

Be the first to blackout out all the squares and win – squares that you have already X’d out still count!
Be the first to call out “Blackout bingo!” in comments and you, too,
can win an as yet to be determined fabulous prize.

Good luck!

Cocky & Rude BINGO!

How to play: Pay attention to upcoming posts and mark your card appropriately (past posts do not apply). The first person to get five in a row (horizontally, vertically or diagonally) and shout, “BINGO!” in comments wins a fabulous prize.

Good luck!

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Happy Birthday Craig!


Tomorrow is a very exciting day! Harry and I are going to see a taping of the Conan O’Brien show! Also, it’s Craig’s birthday. So here is a post celebrating my favorite bloggy muse and one of the greatest movies ever made.
*Sung to the tune “Xanadu”.


The site where everyone wants to go


The blog that we came to know


It’s called Puntabulous


And now
Click on your mouse and see


Posts filled with joi de vivre
We are Puntabulous


A million monkeys dancing
And there you are, an avatar


An everlasting world
And you’re here with me
A devotee


Puntabulous, Puntabulous
Now we are here
Puntabulous


Puntabulous, Puntabulous
Now we are here
Puntabulous


Puntabulous your argyle lights will shine
For us, Puntabulous


The laughs
Of commenters far and near


Are filled with delight and cheer
We feel Puntabulous


The dream
That came through a million hits


Is made up of bytes and bits
It’s called Puntabulous


A million monkeys dancing
And there you are, an avatar


An everlasting world
And you’re here with me
A devotee


Puntabulous, Puntabulous
Now we are here
Puntabulous


Puntabulous, Puntabulous
Now we are here
Puntabulous


Good, dorky fun
Craig’s number one
Puntabulous


Good, dorky fun
Craig’s number one
Puntab u lous
Puntabulou…ou….oussssssssssssssssssssssssssssss