Tag Archives: peanut butter

Biggest C&R Loser 2013

Biggest_CR_Loser_2013

Welcome to the 8th week of Biggest C&R Loser 2013! This year we’ll be keeping all of the results and placings secret until the end of the contest. We’ll also be pooling our cash to award the 2013 winner the largest prize we’ve ever awarded … a whopping $40!  This week’s theme is “TEMPTATION” – Everyone is tempted by something (food, laziness, sleep) when they should be eating healthy and exercising.  What tempts the contestants?  Let’s find out!


Polt

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So this week, it’s Temptation. My biggest temptation is: Gay Porn. ‘Well DUH!’ I can hear you all saying now, but I mean as it relates to this contest. See, if I give in to the temptation of the uncounted amount of gay porn on the Internet, then I spend time watching that and NOT out walking. And after watching gay porn, I’m generally in need of replenishing my…energies. So I eat. And usually it’s snacky-stuff, that’s not healthy for me. So if I could resist the gay porn, I could be exercising more and eating better. …..but yeah, we ALL know that ain’t gonna happen.


Tam

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My temptations are books, I’m either reading one (Don’t ya love my snazzy red e-reader?) or writing one and Chapman’s oatmeal cookies and chocolate ice-cream sandwiches. But they were on sale. How could I not buy them? I’m just a lazy ass all around. I should be up doing something useful and energetic, but I’d rather surf the net and do reading-type stuff. Which would explain why there is no way in hell I am winning the $40.


TwoPi

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I’ve mostly been eating what I want. I’ve gotten over my cravings for sweets (fairly easy) and for salty snack foods (harder). But what I’m so so SO tempted by is caffeinated coffee. My physician took me off caffeine last summer, and I’ve been successful staying off. But man, when I get behind on grading papers, get up early to get work done before the kids wake up, and I’m sipping my third cup of decaf wondering why it isn’t doing it for me…dang. I’ve been jonesing for caffeine pretty badly lately.


Adam

Lately I’ve been tempted to actually lose weight. I’ve been considering a visit to the gym. I’ve even thought about counting calories. Maybe I’ll actually succumb to the temptation!!


Michelle M.

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What tempts me? My inner child. Grown up me knows she should eat right and exercise, but my inner child is quite the little temptress. What she says pretty much goes.


Mikey

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My number one temptation is take out. Living in NYC it is sooooo easy to order anything to your door, but that doesn’t necessarily mean you will eat well. At least once a week I am tired enough to think about ordering…but my brain denies it.


Mr. Sombrero

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I get tempted so easily. Mostly by peanut butter and anything else that starts with the word, “Reese’s.” Late at night when I’m watching Chelsea Lately, I think that should be exercising. Instead, I just close my eyes and imagine that I am Mena Suvari in American Beauty, being showered with rose petals. Except that it’s me instead of Mena, and I’m being showered with jars of PB. And then I get hit in the head and wake up. Then it’s time for bed.

Picture 7


Nathan

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My biggest temptation is eating delicious quick unhealthy foods. I’m a sucker for pizza. Making healthy choices is more expensive and more work, and I’m just lazy I guess.


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Biggest C&R Loser 2013

Biggest_CR_Loser_2013

Happy Valentine’s Day!  Welcome to the 7th week of Biggest C&R Loser 2013! This year we’ll be keeping all of the results and placings secret until the end of the contest. We’ll also be pooling our cash to award the 2013 winner the largest prize we’ve ever awarded … a whopping $40!  This week’s theme is always a Biggest C&R Loser favorite!  It’s time for: “What’s Inside Your Fridge?” Let’s see what our contestants are hiding behind the refrigerator door!  This week each of our contestants will show you a photo of their fridge and describe the contents. Here we go!


Nathan

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My fridge at home looks a lot like the one in this photo. Now that I’m leeching off my parents for practice teaching, they only have healthy things in the fridge. It should be good for me as long as I don’t splurge on my own! Which I won’t, because I’m broke.


Polt

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Ah yes, this week is the fridge picture. And here we go! Top shelf: OJ, milk, butter, Ginger ale; next shelf: eggs, carrots, celery, salsa; next shelf: Salad stuff, and meat (to make chili tonight); next shelf: Diet Coke, baking soda, two bottles of wine, one bottle of beer; In the lower drawer is an onion, for the chili; The door shelves contain condiments, then yogurt, the applesauce. Healthy, I know! But now I’m really looking forward to the chili tonight!


Tam

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So. Our fridges. I tried to have it neater this time so Adam wouldn’t freak out. I only got groceries on Sunday so I’m surprised it’s not fuller (more full?). My freezer is stocked up and yes, that is two containers of Hagen Daas. But come one, it was $3 off, and it’s next to the box of Weight Watchers egg mcmuffins so I think that has a moderating effect on the ice-cream calories. I tend to fill up the freezer, then don’t buy anything until it empties out. Just restocked. Our top shelf is usually lunch stuff, pudding, juice, etc. There are some leftovers in there this time, I usually have an average number of fruits and veggies in the bottom and we have lots of juice and soda in the door along with various bottles of sauce, relish, whipped cream in a can, marinade, salad dressing, etc. Oh and that little drawer inside is chock full of cheese. (Sorry Michelle) So an average fridge? We take our lunch to work/school every day and we cook dinner at home 13 out of 14 days, so we usually have a lot of staples on hand to make it fast and easy.


TwoPi

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Atop the fridge are several boxes of cereal, bottles of dishwasher detergent, and vitamins. Freezer is packed, mostly with frozen fruit, ice cube trays, and coffee. The main section of the fridge has waaaay too much stuff in it, with the bottom shelf dominated by a pot of broccoli-bean-and-lemon pasta, and various other containers of leftovers. Good luck finding what you’re looking for in there!


Adam

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In the freezer I have some frozen veggies and pitas. On the fridge door I have some condiments, seltzer, rice milk, canned fruit and water. In the fridge I have some Fresca, veggies, fake cheese, leftover taco “meat”, apples, hummus, peanut butter, tofu and tempeh. YUM! Now I want to go eat it all.


Michelle M.

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We always have the following in the fridge: juice, salad dressings, condiments, fruits, veggies, Harry’s beer and my zinfandel (Beringer’s!), dill pickles (Adam’s favorite) and salsa. There are usually ingredients for a meal or leftovers from my cooking, but I didn’t cook this week (lazy!), so the fridge is a little bare. There are some leftover fajitas from the Mexican restaurant where we had dinner the other night. And the yogurt (yuck!) is Harry’s, he’s been making smoothies.

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In the freezer: 1st drawer: frozen veggies. 2nd drawer: popsicles (Harry had a cold/sore throat), ice cream and vodka. I find when I freeze Thin Mints, the box will last longer than a day. That hummus is soooo garlicky – when Harry eats it, the house reeks of garlic. That’s why it was banished to the freezer (until I’m out of town or die). 3rd drawer: Lots of leftovers (in the back), some Lonely Man dinners and a big old bag of strawberries for Harry’s smoothies.


Mikey

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What’s in my fridge? Not a lot at all as you can see. There are a lot of condiments though…I’m on the all condiment diet you see. Lots of flavor…very little health.


Mr. Sombrero

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Now that I look at this picture I realize how crammed, small, messy and badly-lit this fridge is. Maybe I should be on Food Hoarders, if there is a show like that. It does have good things in it. Lots of veggies and fruits, some protein and leftovers. Yummmmm!


Who Needs To Diet When You Can Just Bang Instead?

This guy used to be a fat ass until he started masturbating 100 times a day!

A recent article on Shine From Yahoo! has listed the amount of calories you can burn by participating in romantic activities.

Making Out, 30 minutes: 230 calories
Foreplay20 minutes: 87 calories for women, 107 for men
Unclasping a bra with both hands: 8 calories
Unclasping a bra with one hand: 18 calories
Unclasping a bra with your mouth: 67 calories
Strip Tease: 60 calories
Oral Sex: 100 calories
Missionary Position, 10 minutes: 250 calories
Woman on Top, 10 minutes: 300 calories for women, 130 calories for men
Sex Standing Up: Up to 600 calories for both people
Masturbation: Up to 150 calories per session
Orgasm: From 60-100 calories

What does this mean?

Each time you eat three Oreo cookies (160 calories), you should perform one session of oral sex and then do a strip tease.

After eating a scoop of vanilla ice cream (2-1/2 oz. – 170 calories), you should masturbate and then unclasp a bra with on hand.

After binging on an entire jar of peanut butter (18 oz. – 3,200 calories), you should have sex standing up 5 times and then unclasp about 12 bras with one hand.

I think you get the point…

So how many calories have you burned lately? Why do we even bother exercising when we can just bang instead? And after reading this, are you going to rethink your exercise routine?


Biggest Cock & Rudest Loser 3: Week 11

Our tenth week is complete! Today our contestants celebrate ten weeks into the cockiest and rudest weight loss competition evahhhh! It’s Biggest Cock & Rudest Loser 3!

As we begin the 11th week of BC&RL3, we take a peek at somewhere BC&RL has never gone before … into the cupboards! Much like our ‘in the fridge’ week, this week we take a look inside each of our contestant’s cupboards, pantries, or wherever they’re storing their non-refrigerated foodstuff.  Check it out!


TwoPi
Our pantry is a converted broom closet. The top two shelves hold liquids (olive oil, vinegar, key lime juice, Thai fish sauce, etc…), while the next two shelves are mostly canned goods (lots of pineapple, tuna, various soups, tomatoes, etc….) The lowest shelves (mostly off camera) have non-food items, such as trash bags and various food storage items. I mostly use the stuff on the top two shelves; the rest of the pantry mostly consists of forgotten items lost in the transition from grocery bag to dust bin.


Tam
This could be called my Carb Cupboard (sorry Polt). This picture shows it tidier than it sometimes is, and messier than at other times. The top shelf is carb heaven – pasta, noodles, mac & cheese and rice; second shelf is canned goods and things like drink mixes; third shelf is breakfast stuff – cereal, juice (and ice-cream toppings – not so breakfasty); fourth shelf is snacks – crackers, chips, popcorn, little fruit cup thingies for lunches; bottom shelf is trash bags, light bulbs and potatoes. There is a shelf above you can’t see, but it is empty juice jugs, vases and booze. Ahem.


Mr. Sombrero
All I have are spices and shit. I’m going for the win. Vote for me in The Messiest A** Pantry – 2012. Yeah, no comment.


Ryan
Most of my non-refrigerated food is in these three cupboards. The others contain some spices and extra dry goods. Note the supply of oatmeal, raisins, and cinnamon ready for breakfast.


Polt
So this week, we’re talking what’s in our cupboard. In my cupboards all I have are dishes, glasses, Tupperware, that sorta stuff. I do have a pantry, but I use that for storage purposes. And I have a series of shelves in the cellar way, but they only contain some cans of soup, green beans, spaghetti-O’s, fruit salad, some salad dressing and a lonely can of tuna. Most of my non-refrigerated food I just store on my counter top like so: cereal, popcorn, peanut butter, whole wheat bread, spray cheese, sugarless caramels, Pringles, and Crystal Light. I don’t eat the pathetic looking plant there, I’ve had Janis for about ten years, longer than any plant I’ve ever had.


Mikey
You can see that I keep my kitchen cabinets better stocked than the fridge. That is influenced by the fact that I am obsessed with having every possible spice on hand in case it ever comes up in an exotic recipe. AND I DON’T HAVE THEM ALL YET. You can also see healthy olive oil on one shelf and brown rice on the other. See…I am trying.


Michelle M.
We have a tiny cupboard. Here’s what’s in it.
1. coffee (for Harry) tea and hot chocolate
2. canned vegetables and beans
3. nuts, popcorn, raisins, nuts and emergency chocolate
4. rice, pasta, lentils, Asian noodles
5. bread, soup, vegetable and chicken broth
6. cooking oils, hot sauce, pasta sauce, peanut butter
7. cereal, granola bars, pretzels, crackers
8. baking stuff
9. Harry’s breakfast fixings (oatmeal and stuff to make it taste good).


Adam
Left top: teas, oatmeal, olive oil. Left middle: Emergen-C, random ingredients, soy sauce, pepper oil, balsamic vinegar. Bottom left: lots of spices and seasonings. Top right: flour, rice, sugars. Middle right: Indian food, raisins, Maggi noodles, lentils, popcorn. Bottom right: canned veggies, sauces and vitamins.


And now the week’s results:

Stay tuned each Thursday for the stunning weight-loss success stories of our eight contestants. Who will win this year’s competition? Find out on May 31st … just in time for bikini season!

R.I.P.

Don’t you just hate it when a product you love is discontinued? I do! Here are just a few of my favorite things that no longer exist.

Bath Products: Listerex Herbal Facial Scrub kept my face nice and clear and Bonne Bell Shower 2000 (the green kind) smelled soooo good). I sure miss Gee Your Hair Smells Terrific! shampoo. It really did make my hair smell terrific.

Snack Foods: Chipsters and Korkers, Dixie Snack crackers (they were shaped liked little drumsticks), Dip in a Chip crackers and Flaky Flix cookies. Mrs. Field’s cookie stores are no longer around (in San Diego – and the Mrs. Field’s grocery store cookies just aren’t the same). And neither are the Pretzel Time stores – my favorite of the mall pretzel stores. Boo!

and Candy: I mentioned before how much I liked the now extinct Choco Lite bar. I also miss the Marathon Bar. And why doesn’t See’s Candies make the peanut butter lolly pop anymore? They said it’s due to peanut allergies, but their other candies contain peanuts. Whatever, See’s.

Entrees: I’m not an adventurous eater. When I go to a restaurant, I usually get the same thing. Hey, I know what I like! So imagine my dismay when my go-to meal has disappeared from the menu.

The Thai chicken wrap at Mimi’s Cafe.

The steak salad at Rock Bottom.

The chili at Red Robin.

And Harry is mourning the disappearance of the salmon sliders at Sammy’s Woodfire Pizza.

Well, those are just some of the things that I miss. How about you? Are there any products/foods that you will never, ever enjoy again? Let me know in comments!

Biggest Cock & Rudest Loser 3: Week 3

Our second week is complete! Today our contestants celebrate two weeks into the cockiest and rudest weight loss competition evahhhh! It’s Biggest Cock & Rudest Loser 3!

Diet is an important part of every weight-loss regimen. This week, the contestants were invited to tell us how they’ve changed their diet to help attain their weight-loss goals. Here’s what they said:


Michelle M.
My diet this past week has pretty much consisted of cough drops, orange juice and ginger ale. If I could keep this up, I would reach my goal weight in no time at all. When I’m feeling better, though, I’ll be cutting out the junk food and trying not to eat after 8pm.


Ryan
My diet hasn’t changed much because I never went back to my old diet after last year. My current calorie budget is around 1800 calories from a balanced mix of carbs, protein, and fat. Like last year, oatmeal with raisins is my breakfast. Lately, I have been experimenting with dishes that combine beans and pineapple.


Tam
Yes, this picture represents my “diet” for the past week. Gotta love being on a work trip. Ugh. So I’ve only been back 3 days really, back on the “wagon”, the starvation wagon. Next week be better. Swear. I bought all the stuff to make salad for my work lunch. I like salad, I’m just to lazy to prepare it. I also have banned any ice-cream in my house that I would like to eat. No temptation. Lately I’ve been craving sweet things, so I stocked up on my fave black seedless grapes and pineapple so hopefully when I get the craving for cake, those will suffice. Now that I’m home and can determine how things are cooked I think it will be easy to be careful. I think according to Spark people I eat about 1300 – 1500 calories a day. I’m usually at the low end if I pay attention and am not at the muffin/beer buffet. Hey, but at least I’m not up. Go me.


TwoPi
I love to cook. It is a central piece of who I am, one of my favorite recreational activities. Whatever dietary changes I put in place now need to be ones I can sustain for the long haul. So for the most part, I’m unwilling to change my diet, my cooking habits, although I am working toward incorporating more green vegetables and less protein, less fat, into the choices I make. The primary change in my diet isn’t what I’m eating, but how much I’m eating. I’m trying to be conscious of portion sizes, of not taking seconds, of not snacking out of boredom. (I love numbers, but I’m not counting calories.) No doubt the scale shows that I’m making modest progress at best, but in all honesty I’m not worried about losing the most weight in BC&RL3, I more concerned with being able to keep the weight off while still feeling satisfied in the kitchen and dining room.


Polt
So this week, we’re supposed to talk about how our diet’s changed. Mine…hasn’t. Although, come to think of it, I have been eating a lot of Cheetos lately. That shouldn’t be a problem, I mean they’re just cheesey-powder covered air anyway, right? And air has no calories, right? So, yeah, this is a good thing in my opinion.


Mikey
My diet has changed moderately so far. I’m working to cut back on fried foods and unnecessary sugars (like tonic….sure club soda is really boring, but so many fewer calories!). I never count calories, only cocktails, of which there have been few since I am sick with bronchitis and I shouldn’t even be writing this thing. The upside to being sick is that I’m losing weight by not doing much. That’s awesome.


Adam
This week, like many of the other BC&RL3-ers, I was plagued by illness. A splitting migraine and a 4-5 days of nausea left me without much in my belly. My diet (now that I have recovered) will consist of healthy meals and no snacking. I usually eat very healthy meals, but I’m awful at maintaining my diet once the sun goes down. Cookies, chips, pretzels and candy are the salty and sweet nightly demons that make me fat. But no more!


Mr. Sombrero
I have to admit that I haven’t given much thought to the diet factor of this challenge. Nutritionally my diet is pretty good but my biggest enemies are peanut butter and quesadillas. That will be the toughest part, scaling down on those yummy monsters. And the fact that Adam just gave me his quesadilla maker is not making it any easier to get on track… Now that I think about it, he might be trying to sabotage me… [insert gasp and dramatic telenovela music here]


And now, the week’s results:

Stay tuned each Thursday for the stunning weight-loss success stories of our eight contestants. Who will win this year’s competition? Find out on May 31st … just in time for bikini season!

[NSFW?] “Like Disco Lemonade…”