My Last Meal

The other day I came across a macabre, yet interesting blog – Dead Man Eating. It features the last meals of prisoners condemned to death. In the event that Mr. M. cheats on me or Adam shares another stupid vagina-hate post, I will most likely be enjoying a last meal of my own.

I’m probably going to be a little depressed and anxious about sitting in Old Sparky, so I’d like to share my last supper with some people who will lift my spirits. Here are some of my favorite comedians who will keep me laughing all the way down that green mile. By the way, I’m going to see the hilarious Kathy Griffin this month! Second row! If you’re not totally jealous, there is something wrong with you.

I gave a ridiculous amount of thought into what I want my last meal to be.

I will start with a couple of Godiva’s milk chocolate caramels, then gnosh on some nuts (macadamia, Brazil and pecans are my favorites). Next, I’ll have a few handfuls of Lay’s potato chips and Tostito’s Hint of Lime chips (aka: the devil’s chips). Oh my god, I love bread and butter! I think the Outback’s bread is deeelicious – I can eat it forever. I’ll be wanting a nice juicy steak, too (suck it Adam. Woohoo! Kathy Griffin!). And french fries – greasy and salty, please. A tomato salad sounds tasty, as does corn on the cob with enough butter to bring Paula Deen to orgasm – gotta make sure to eat my veggies (right, Polt?). Chicken in brandy peppercorn sauce is next on the list, followed by mashed potatoes (food of the gods). I must have some grilled pineapple, too. I’ll wash this all down with fruity cocktails (and keep ’em coming)! For dessert I’d like a piece chocolate cake with ice cream and a slice of cherry pie. And finally, a wafer thin-mint.

So, what would you like your last meal to be? And with whom would you like to share it? Let me know in the comments!


29 thoughts on “My Last Meal”

  1. Oh my, you wouldn’t have to go in the electric chair, you’d just explode.

    It’s a really hard choice. The steak, mashed potatoes, corn and tomato salad sound delish, so does the chocolate cake, although I might also have a piece of German chocolate cheesecake with that, or coconut, or lemon. I assume I’d share with my kid, she won’t eat the tomatoes though. I don’t think I’d be up to entertaining a crowd if it was my last day.

  2. Can’t ever get enough corn on the cob. But my last meal? Probably the cute Asian twinkie with a hairthing they get to bring the food to me. If I’m going to be visiting Old Sparky, it wont be food that I’ll be wantin’ right before then end!


  3. My last meal would include a Super Vegetarian Burrito from El Toro in San Francisco, Salmon roll with cream cheese on brown rice sushi from Whole Foods, Creamsicle martini made by PJ at FreeZone in Las Vegas, and an assortment of my mom’s dessert specialties including mini-cheesecakes and eclairs.

  4. Pizza (thick crust, pep, artichoke and feta, extra sauce), salmon (smoked, broiled and sashimi), chicken curry (extra spicy, extra baby corn), cheesecake with cherries and wash it down with a variety of IPA, stouts and porters. I’d invite Michelle.. and Adam. No, Craig. No, Adam. No! Why can’t they just get along!?

    You’re going to see Kathy? That’s awesome! Me, too! I’m also in the second row! Maybe I’ll see you there.

    Couldn’t eat another bite…

  5. OMG this post made me so hungry. I’m gonna go home and kick my refrigerator in the nuts for not having anything so delicious in it.

    I want to copy your answer. But mozzerella sticks, steak, fries, and jello with cool whip are involved.

  6. On a totally random note, do they let you have booze with your last meal in prison? Could you have a nice margarita with your last meal? I’d think that was forbidden, but then you’re going to die so I figure you should get whatever you want.

  7. Lasagna, my former mother-in-law’s home made pizza and a good loaf of crusty Italian bread. For dessert: french toast and some ice cream.

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