Mouths of Babes

Kids and young adults can be cute as bugs. They are often adorable even. They can also be really stupid. To prove this fact, I give you the tumblr site Sh!t My Students Write. I don’t know if it just me, but I don’t recall making as many errors in such a wide fashion as some of these students have.

Take this one for example:

The rebel and onion armies showed grose negligence by having many of their battles right inside national parks, like Gettysburg.

The onion thing was enough to make me laugh, but then they had to pull out the national parks argument showing that they didn’t get the whole concept. Personally I would been interested in seeing an onion army wage war against the rebels. Perhaps the rebels will come armed with garlic and shallots. We could use the remains to make a nice yummy meal.

And yet another great one:

Indians, the other dark meat, were saved from extinction by the humanitarian, Andrew Jackson.

Wow. Cannibalism? Andrew Jackson, Humanitarian? I guess compared to some people like Hitler, who’s goal was to destroy the Jews, not just relocate them, Jackson could be considered a humanitarian. The trail of tears that lead to disease, death and the loss of many Native American cultures was not humanitarian. I can’t even muster a response to the “dark meat” thing.

After reading this site, I think it is no wonder American schools are falling behind the rest of the world. And now my Saturday is sad.

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5 thoughts on “Mouths of Babes”

  1. I shall have to check it out, and be depressed with you. I know not all kids are that dumb though. I do like when kids leave snarky answers on tests when they don’t know the answers. I think it shows imagination. I wonder if teachers find it amusing or annoying?

  2. I once had a student write as an essay for her final exam. “I am super. I have the power to kill.” She scored a 2/100.

    One of the students I’m currently tutoring was absent 9 times out of 18 sessions for the month of March. Of the 9 sessions she did make, she would only show up for 1 out of the 2 hours a session lasts. She then questioned her report card as to why she didn’t receive an A+. Her reasoning was when she did show up, she did her work, so that should be enough for an A.

  3. The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy.
    Martin Luther King, Jr.

    Beautiful quote, right? I had a student who had to interpret this as part of a critical lens essay. His interpretation? “When you have to fight, you fight. When you don’t have to fight, don’t fight.” His reasoning? “If you fight when you don’t have to fight, you might die. so only fight when you have to, then it will be all right.”

  4. That is sad. I get depressed when I read comments on the internet (except for the Puntabugang comments, of course). There are a lot of angry, ignorant idiots out there. And they can’t spell!

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