Biggest Cock & Rudest Loser 2, Week Eight

It’s Thursday, and you know what that means … it’s time for another edition of everyone’s favorite weight loss competition: Biggest Cock & Rudest Loser 2!  This week we’ve invited Lindsay Lohan along for the ride!  It’s a true honor to have superstar Ms. Lohan with us today because she might be going to jail very soon.  This week Lindsay asked each of the players how they’re feeling and if they’re sick of the competition.  Here’s what they had to say…

Adam: I’m not sick of this contest, actually just the opposite!  I’m finally almost over my cold from last week, and I’m ready to kick some ass.  I’ve had a itch to exercise, so I might actually get off my ass once or twice in the next week.  I hope that I don’t get voted off this week, cuz I don’t wanna lose (yet)!

Fdot:
1. There once was a boy named FDot.
Every week he lost weight on the spot.
But to type up a blurb,
Every week was absurd.
So this time he thought he would not.

2. So a poem he would write in its stead,
Then go eat a sandwich without any bread.
But he wishes he could choose
That for the weight to lose
He could go eat some Hershey’s instead.

Jere: Fuck me. After working until 11pm yesterday, I had to be at school an hour early today to make up for one of our snow days. That means 3 solid hours of Income Tax law. There is nothing about exceptions to the deductibility of interest on loans under section 62 of the tax code that should be spoken of prior to my morning coffee. I’m pretty sure my professor was just making up words for about 15 minutes. Amortization? Like I’m going to believe that’s a thing. Anyway, yeah, so I got out of that class and went straight to the gym where the cute guys look away uncomfortably when they catch me staring at them. And in the middle of my run, I notice a banner at the bottom of CNN on the screen attached to the treadmill next to me “Obama Announces Administration will No Longer Defend Marriage Act.” Well, I almost fell off my fucking treadmill as I scrambled to plug my earphones into the gym machine and figure out which channel was CNN. Then, as they started going on and on about Libya again, I noticed that I was going to be late to my table time for my job as a rep for one of the bar preparation companies, so I barely had time to shower and eat lunch (literally) on the run back to school. Then I finished up my shift at the table with about 60 minutes to completely rewrite my direct examination of this witness for our trial advocacy competition and I’m getting fucking sassed on Facebook because I haven’t sent in my blurb. Bitchez.

Mr. Sombrero: Ay ay ay… I LOVE this competition for keeping us motivated and the fact that everyone, well most 😉 are doing such a good job. The weight loss progress for me is slow (damn you oreos!) but consistent (yay zumba!). Tuesdays are really good, because all that nagging about having to submit the blurbs and weigh yourself the next day stops me from eating junk food.  😀

Mush: I don’t hate this competition. In fact, it’s good for me. Dieting is boring and hard and it sucks, but it’s much better to suffer with others. I don’t know if my last remaining shred of self-discipline will survive the end of the contest. Without Adam and Mikey bitching at me every Wednesday to WAKE UP and WEIGH MYSELF ALREADY, I don’t know that I’d bother to do either. Counting calories has become second nature to me, but all I want to do lately is EAT MORE. My twelve hundred calorie days are over, replaced with fifteen hundred calorie days. Which is probably where I’m supposed to me for the entire rest of my life. GACK.

Paul: I love this competition! I feel great, one day this week I ate some stuff I shouldn’t have and felt so bad after and realized that I had felt that bad most of the time. I have lost 3 inches off my waist and will soon be in need of new clothes, well ok, just start wearing the clothes I had before I started packing it on. By the time I reach my goal weight I will be wearing parachute pants and a Members Only jacket.

Ryan: I’m still loving this competition. I been managing to lose weight steadily without making myself miserable. I plan to keep this up even after the competition is over. However, I worry about this next week. Going to a conference this weekend means that I will be eating out a lot without access to my tracking tools to help me stay on course.


And now, this week’s results:



And now, like every week it’s time to eliminate a player. Here’s how it works: just like American Idol, you vote for the team that you want to save. The team with the least votes will be eliminated. Polls close around Noon (EST) on Saturday.


Lindsay says, “Congratulations to everyone!”
Don’t forget to vote, and feel free to discuss this week’s results in the comments!

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11 thoughts on “Biggest Cock & Rudest Loser 2, Week Eight”

  1. Yay! Not only was this posted before I left for the airport tomorrow morning, I’m not in danger of being eliminated. Now we get to see how I manage when I’m on the road.

  2. I just realized that I’m within striking distance of third place, which means that I might be able to survive long enough to catch up. I still doubt that I will win, but unlike last week, I can now see it as possible.

  3. Congratulations everyone!
    To be fair, I should vote Adam (since he’s at the top of the bottom three and I adore him). But this contest isn’t about fair, so I voted for Fdot and his cute poem (and because I adore him, too).

  4. Great job guys and I have to say I laughed out loud at the Paul and Lyndsey picture. They were all hilarious. I hate having to see someone go but y’all get high fives from me. I’m back on the wagon today. Swear.

  5. I don’t think anybody should be voted out this week, cause the less people that are voted out means less competition for the cabana boys over here in the loser’s tent!

    Good luck all!

    HUGS…

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