Kissing M. Night Shyamalan, In My Dreams!

Last Friday night, I had a dream that I kissed M. Night Shyamalan.  It wasn’t an open-mouth, tongue kiss or anything, just a few little pecks.  Actually, I think that Dream Adam tried to go a little further, but M. Night wasn’t interested.  I guess he was too much of a gentleman.

I almost never have romantic dreams.  Honestly, this is probably the most dream-action I’ve gotten in years.  I’ve always been jealous of people that have big crazy sex dreams.  A no regret, no disease tryst in the middle of sleepy time?  What could be better?  (Other than sexitime with M. Night Shyamalan in real life?!)

0:08 – Check out this mildly attractive doofus. He has sex dreams! Jealous!

0:10 – I like his t-shirt, but why does he have so many things plugged into that electrical outlet? Fire hazard!

0:19 – I don’t need any of these things because I never have sex dreams.  ((cries))

0:21 – Is that lube on his bedside table? Oh, wait … it’s just contact lens solution.

0:39 – OMG that girl has horns!

0:41 – mildly attractive doofus needs to do more sit-ups … and he needs to clean up his bedroom before making web videos.

0:51 – Eww! Where’d his chin go?!

1:10 – Maybe I don’t feel like I am being ignored and/or fear being abandoned? No, that can’t be right.

1:22 – Bewbz represent nurturance and sexual arousal? I’m so confused! I thought p33n did that?!

1:28 – So … for homosexual people, does straight sexitime represent self love? That doesn’t seem right…

1:35 – Why do expectant fathers have homogay dreams? I bet it’s because they’re so grossed out by the giant seed of Satan in their ladyfriend’s enormously fat belly that they secretly wanna switch to the cool team.

1:40 – Mildly attractive doofus has weird handwriting.

1:46 – And he writes all of his letters backwards! What’s with that?!

1:52 – Yay! Mildly attractive doofus has sex dreams that star his cross-dressing tranny brother/sister!

My fingers are cross that I’ll have another dream-date with M. Night Shyamalan soon.  Hopefully on our second date he won’t be such a prude!  Then I’ll be able to use everything I learned in this helpful video to make sense out of all of my strange feelings!  M. is probably a gentle lover, but I’m sure that every sexitime encounter would have to end with a predictable twist ending.  Either that, or he has to do about 10 minutes of tai-chi before showing me his superpower.

Now I wanna hear all about your sex dreams (preferably the homogay kind).  Please remember to include a detailed description of hot celebrity penises.  Thanks!


7 thoughts on “Kissing M. Night Shyamalan, In My Dreams!”

  1. I am in a similar situation to you. I RARELY have sexytime dreams and if I do they tend to feature my ex. EEWWWWWWWWW! Then even in my dream I’m going “this is wrong”. Sigh. Just once I’d like to have a wild sex dream with some celebrity stud. Okay, even a gay dream would work.

  2. I rarely have wet sex dreams either. Either I really want to and get denied, or I wake up when we start going at it. One of the only times I actually got to go all the way was when I dreamt about a cute coworker. Made things very awkward when I saw him the next day!

  3. Craig: That wasn’t a dream.

    I’m like Tam, I haven’t had a good sex dream in a long time. Perhaps I’m not as stressed as I thought. And no gay dreams for me. Self love is the only love I’m getting these days.

  4. My dreams are lame. Stuff like all my teeth falling out or the apocalypse. I did dream that I went on a cruise with Whoopi Goldberg the other night – but no hanky panky occurred.

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