Say it ain't so, Ricky?!?!

Just in case you didn’t hear the bombshell news yesterday, Ricky Martin is a “fortunate homosexual man.”  Middle aged women everywhere are just devastated by this news, while everyone in my generation stares at them with blank looks of incredulity on their faces.

Was anyone seriously shocked by this announcement?  He fathered two children through a surrogate with the intentions of raising them alone.  Does this sound like any attractive single straight men you know?  Or what about the fact that he got his big break into the American pop music scene with the help of  the supreme cone-breasted one and predecessor of Lady Gaga: Madonna.

I applaud Ricky’s willingness be public about his sexual orientation.  I have never been a famous musician or artist and had to have my personal life examined by people who seem to think they have some right to all the nitty-gritty details.  But I guess I’m a little sad that he couldn’t do it at the peak of his fame rather than as an attempt to maintain his cultural relevance.

The same goes for Sean Hayes.  I’m probably more bitter about this than most of you (and most people who know me are saying “umm…you are always bitter!”), but I think it has to do with the time that both of these stars were reaching the high points of their careers.  That time just so happen to coincide with the time when I was a young gay man struggling to come out in this heteroworld.  I’m not saying my struggle to come out would have been easier if Martin or Hayes came out to. I’m not that naive (at least not anymore).

I do think it did have an impact on me to see these two men that I identified as gay, not acknowledging it and embracing it, at a time when I was just learning what it meant to be  a big ‘mo.  Unlike most straight people, we gays are born into families that lack adult role models that share our orientations.  I think that’s a big part of why we seek out our own kind and make our own families.  We need people like us out there who make us feel that it will be okay, that our gayness can be celebrated, and that our loves can be loved.

So here is hoping that Ricky’s newly announced gayness can help at least one young person feel accepted in this wild heteroworld.  I will rest easily tonight knowing that my nascent gaydar was on point!


9 thoughts on “Say it ain't so, Ricky?!?!”

  1. I think the pressure on celebs is enormous to keep it hidden. I suppose it’s not until their careers are on the downswing that no one gives a damn if they come out because they aren’t working much anyway. How could it get worse?

    But yeah, Ricky wasn’t a big surprise. I seem to have missed the Sean Hayes thing but I never watched that show anyway.

  2. I read this yesterday and had two thoughts: 1) Dur. and 2). Who cares?

    I really wish people would realize that love is love, who cares about the plumbing. I’m with Tam, I think there are complexities to fame that prevent many stars from living their lives as they would like. I applaud any celebrity who chooses to come out and don’t fault any one for staying in the closet. I do, however, have a huge problem with people who live one life privately, but try to set law restricting the lives of others. I have no respect for that.

    As a side, I read Sean Hayes and thought: Who?

  3. I really can’t believe anyone considers this ‘news’. I think it would be newsworthy if he proved he wasn’t gay. Like, I don’t know, with a videotape, and signed affidavits, and sworn testimony and what have you.

    Course, even though he did come out, a videotape would STILL be nice to see…..


  4. I was not shocked at all – aren’t most celebrities rumored to be gay anyway? It seems as though more celebrities are coming out – which is terrific in my book. I wonder who will be next…

      1. I dont know Tam, if that we true wouldn’ t everyone be only children? I mean, anyone with a younger brother or sister would seem to prove that it’s not just a memory. 🙂


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