Are You Hetero?

Today I stumbled upon this tool on the Stockholm Pride 2009 website.  It measures how hetero you are based on the words that you tweet!  Is it accurate?  Not really … but it’s fun!  I’ve polled a bunch of the people that I follow.  Here they are in descending order:

Topping the list is CockyAndRude, the twitter account of this blog. Apparently we don’t use enough cliché terms to be considered even 1% hetero.  Next up is me, who is apparently super-duper 84% hetro because I use terms like “boom boom” and “ikea”.  Next on the list is Neil Patrick Harris who uses terms like “milk” and rad” and is clearly straight as well, since his tweets track at 72% hetero.  Next on the list is Craig from Puntabulous.  He’s 66% hetero, since he uses terms such as “bunny,” “booth,” and “circle jerk.”   At 54% and 51% are Josh from Josh Is Trashy and Enrico from Hotel Tuesday, thanks to terms like “asbury park” and “rent” … how half-hetero!  At only 40% hetero is Mikey, because he uses terms such as “gala” and “bukkake.”  And finally, bottoming my list is Conan O’Brien, for using the term “sugar” — it seems that that makes you only 1% hetero.

How hetero are you?


7 thoughts on “Are You Hetero?”

  1. Well, I don’t have Twitter so I checked my daughter’s. Maybe she’s not telling me something.

    She is 77% hetero, her words were hockey, butterfly, body, beef, and flawless. If they say so.

  2. I didn’t register at all, in either direction. “johnpeliot doesn’t use cliché words. We like that.” I hope this means the world is my oyster.

  3. Hmm, I’m 58% hetero, which means I’m straighter than Craiggers (duh!), but gayer than Josherz and Enrickyricardo???? Hmm, well obviously it didn’t take into account incessent tweets about American Idol gossip, which it should have. Then the reults might have been more accurate. Although were that the case, would it be possible for Josherz to be more than 100% gay? 🙂


  4. OOPSIE! Obviously in my desire to make snide remarks, I misread the whole freakin’ entire thing. SO, let’s all totally ignore the previous comment AND that fact that this thing says Craiggers is straighter than me, and let’s just move on to the next comment, kay? Thanks.


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