Welcome to the second week of Biggest C&R Loser 2013! This year we’ll be keeping all of the results and placings secret until the end of the contest. We’ll also be pooling our cash to award the 2013 winner the largest prize we’ve ever awarded … a whopping $40! This week’s theme is “GOAL & PRIZE” - Everything is easier if there’s a goal & prize in place. Each of the contestants will tell us what their personal goal and/or prize is and how it will motivate them to lose weight.
When I win Biggest C&R Loser, I’m going to let Mr. Sombrero buy me an entirely new wardrobe! We’re going to go shopping at Abercrombie & Fitch and buy one of these weird-shaped sports balls. That’s all I’m ever going to wear!
My goal for this round of BCRL is to lose enough weight that I can throw away my fat jeans! Or burn them. Or both!
I am playing to fit into all of my clothes….and to make sure that when I go shopping for clothes I don’t have to constantly buy a size up. I hate that. 
This time around I hope to get serious about my weight loss. I’ve gained a small ton in the past six months and have almost doubled in size since I met Adam. [hmmm?] And all for good reasons: health, general well being and a bunch of clothes that no longer fit.
My goal in this competition is to be healthier and look better. Hopefully like the guy in this photo. It’s important to aim high, so that even if I don’t quite make it, I still get quite far.
What’s my goal and prize for doing this? Well the weight loss will be nice, but my main reason for doing this (other than the money) is my diabetes: I want to get my A1C to 7.0 or below (which makes me a controlled diabetic. Normal people are 6.0 or below). Last March, it was above 9, my doctor yelled at me and put me on a diet. I followed it and in three months, dropped to 7.1 in June. Because I slacked off, in September, it was 7.4. Now, over the holidays, I’m sure it’s gone up again. And this coming Monday i have a doctor’s appointment, where I’m sure she’ll yell at me again. But with her yelling and this contest, hopefully, I can get it back down around or below 7.0. That’s my goal. the prize? Having better health and not dying as soon.
Okay, I was really not mentally prepared for this whole process to start last week. I seemed to be still in the post-holiday sugar-craving mode. Enough. I need to track my food consumption more carefully. No more chocolate. My goal is 15lbs. I know that’s kind of wimpy, but if I don’t set my sights too high I might actually make it and more would be a bonus. Better to aim low and succeed I always say. Well, mostly. Whatever. Reward? I don’t know. Maybe new shoes. I’m always up for new shoes. (And no, I don’t really want pink sequinned sneakers, but something.)
My “prize” is a cruise with my immediate family, hitting various ports along the Baltic. For me, the challenging part of this trip will be its physical demands. I have arthritis in my lumbar spine, and can’t (currently) be on my feet for prolonged periods of time. This will put a serious crimp in our site seeing at the ports of call. I’m working on physical therapy to try and regain some motion and strength, but one thing that would make all of that more effective is weight loss.
Welcome to the first week of Biggest C&R Loser 2013! This year we’ll be keeping all of the results and placings secret until the end of the contest. We’ll also be pooling our cash to award the 2013 winner the largest prize we’ve ever awarded … a whopping $40! But before we get ahead of ourselves, let’s meet this year’s contestants and find out their motivation for participating:
I need to drop some weight before I require a Jazzy Power Scooter. And it’s get’n close.
I am participating because my ass has recently acquired its own moon. I hope to drop at least 10 pounds.
Why am I doing this? Since losing weight for my wedding…I am very fat. It sucks. My goal is to be lose between 20-35 pounds. It can be done.
This year I plan on kicking all your asses and losing a crap-load of weight! Woohoo!
I’ve included a photo of me looking as rotund as possible so that no matter what, my end photo will look way better. It’s all about setting the bar low. Alright, well, I’ve decided to join the competition this year since it’s part of my New Year’s plans anyways, so now I should at least feel some pressure from my throngs of Internet fans. I hope to shed a few pounds this year so that I won’t have to buy new clothes (which I will have to do if I gain any more weight).
So, I’m supposed to tell you why I’m doing this and what I hope to accomplish. Okay, I’m doing it because I’ve participated in every one of these things in the past, it’s tradition! I mean, it wouldn’t be a C&R Biggest Loser contest without Polt not winning it, now would it? And what do I hope to accomplish? Well, winning the money would be pretty nifty, but we all know that ain’t gonna happen. I suppose what I hope to accomplish is to not come in last. The photo is one I used a few years ago, and since I’ve not changed much since then, it seems appropriate to use it again.
I’m back… again. I don’t think I’ve gained any weight since the last time we tried this, well, I had but I’d lost it again. I was doing pretty well until being home from work every day over Christmas. Having access 24/7 to food is not good. So I’m back on the wagon. My technique this time around? I’m not sure yet. I haven’t thought that far ahead, but I really want to get rid of the stuff I gained back a couple of years ago. Hopefully having to check in here every week will keep me more honest and stop me when I’m tempted to just eat something without thinking. Not that it’s worked in the past, but hey, I can hope.
Here I am again! I felt like I did okay in BC&RL3, where my goal was to steadily lose weight without giving up too much. I was mostly able to keep off the weight I lost last time (at least through mid-November), although I have ballooned a bit over the holidays. So I’m back, this time aiming to alter both diet and exercise routines as best I can. I’m hoping to feel healthier and have more mobility by June.
This is it! The final week is complete! Today we reveal the winner of Biggest Cock & Rudest Loser 3, the cockiest and rudest weight loss competition evahhhh! But before we make it official and name Ryan as the winner, let’s check in with our contestants one final time and find out how they’re doing. How do they feel about the contest? Are they proud or disappointed? Would they do it again? Here’s what they had to say, in order of Rudest Loser to Biggest Cock:
MR. SOMBRERO: 8th Place, RUDEST LOSER!
It’s been quite a ride. I’m nowhere near the goal I set for myself but I did manage to lose few tiny pounds of blubber. I think I would be better at it if I didn’t have to write all these weekly updates 8-/ (was that the right emoticon for rolling eyes? Anywho, I will continue ‘participating’ even after this contest is done so maybe by the next round I’ll be more disciplined. And now, if you’ll excuse me, imma go celebrate with señor Cuervo.
POLT: 7th Place!
So this is then, the Final Week. Comparing this with my first photo, you can see I lost the weight, but kept all the skin. *SIGH* What did I think of the contest? Same as the others, although it was fun to check each week and see how everybody else was doing. Would I do it again? Sure why not? I’ve been in all three of them so far, right? Why not a fourth, if there is one? And how did I do? Well, I didn’t lose as much weight as I wanted, but then again, weight loss has always been a secondary goal. I’m on the diet to get my blood sugar under control, per the doctor. And I won’t know how successful I was at that until the middle of June when I get my blood work results. But at any rate, it was fun, congrats to everyone who did better than me (which I presume is everyone else), and I’ll see ya all again in the fourth contest (if there IS one).
ADAM: 6th Place!
I managed to lose of bit of weight during the course of BC&RL3, but overall I’m fairly disappointed with myself. I had hoped to jump start a significant weight loss and that didn’t happen … yet. Losing weight is a constant battle and I really just need to get my head in the game. Am I proud of myself? Yes! Somebody’s gotta be proud of me! ((self hug)) Would I do it again? OF COURSE! (It’s my website, I don’t have a choice!) Love to you all and congrats to Ryan!!
TWOPI: 5th Place!
I’m submitting the same photo that I started this competition with, as I feel like I’m just getting started on my diet, WWO-style. I’m pleased that I managed some modest weight loss in BC&RL3, but I need more dramatic changes to get to where I want to be.
TAM: 4th Place!
Well, overall I’m disappointed in my result. I know it’s mostly because I didn’t exercise but it did make me more conscious of what’s going into my mouth, not a bad thing and it’s nice to know I’m not the only slack ass out there who can’t stick to a diet. Yay for the lazy dieters club. I intend on keeping up the efforts and keep trying. Maybe I’ll even put more effort in. Or not. I’m not sure but I’m going to not be so oblivious as I go forward, so thanks for that C&R, it’s been fun, sort of.
MICHELLE M.: 3rd Place!
I’m sad the contest is over. Because I’m only about halfway to my goal weight – I went from being a hippo to a pig. But I’m proud of myself because I lost 7 pounds. It’s hard for me to lose weight now that I’m older, so I’ll take what I can get. Too bad I didn’t work out… But I’m going to keep on keepin’ on until I lose the rest of the weight. I don’t want to have to participate in BC&RL 4 next year!
MIKEY: 2nd Place!
Am I proud of myself? YES! I lost more weight in this round of BC&RL than I did in the previous rounds. Also, I’m eating healthier and going to continue to lose weight even now that this stupid thing is over. I will celebrate by commencing operation starvation. Will I do the contest again? YES. Especially if I can end up winning like he was formerly in cupcake form.
RYAN: 1st Place, BIGGEST COCK!!!
I am happy to have lost some more weight, but I’m a little disappointed that I wasn’t as disciplined as last time. At least I’m no longer embarrassed to take off my shirt.
And now the results:
Our twelfth week is complete! Today our contestants celebrate twelve weeks into the cockiest and rudest weight loss competition evahhhh! It’s Biggest Cock & Rudest Loser 3!
BC&RL3 is almost over! What are the contestants going to do after the contest ends? Will they continue their diets or fall back into their old ways? Here’s what they had to say…
Mr. Sombrero
Ok I barely lost any weight but this contest opened my eyes and I realized how much I suck at it an need to take this whole weight-losing seriously. Since I always cram things last minute I hope that I can lose few more pounds by the end of this competition. I have few things lying around the house that can help me do that…
TwoPi
On the advice of my physician, I’ve quit caffeine completely. Next up: joining Weight Watchers online. Charles Barkley says I need to “learn to lose like a man”; I’m guessing he lost a bet or something, based on the photo above. Will WW push my weight loss past the 10% goal I set at the start of BC&RL3? Time will tell. I do know that I won’t end up looking like this photo though — Sir Charles has much better legs than I do.
Tam
Will I continue after this great contest is over? Yes. I’ve been a total slacker lately, but it’s always been there in the back of my mind, so it’s keeping me more honest than I might be otherwise. I have a trip to the UK in Sept. and losing some weight would be nice, so I think I’ll keep at it, even if I don’t have to check in every week. The way things were going before we started this, I would have been up as much as I’ve lost, so if nothing else, this brought my compulsive eating to a halt. I’ll keep slogging away. Congrats to Cupcake. Someday I shall be a cupcake, ’tis my fondest wish. (And I’m writing this before I know who wins, but I’m sure it’s Cupcake.)
Adam
Let’s face it, I’ve done horribly in this competition. But I’m going to change — I swear! Diet, exercise, willpower, and weight loss are all in my future! I hope…
Michelle M.
I’m about halfway to my goal, so I’m going to keep on dieting until I get there. Summer is coming and I want to fit into my shorts!
Ryan
I plan to continue after this, but I haven’t exactly been that diligent over the past few weeks. If I do my best to keep track of what I eat and make my exercise goals, I could hit my next weight goal sometime this summer. I don”t know if that will be the end because I’ve never been this lean in my life, so I have no idea where I want to end up. I think I might pick up running in the next couple of weeks. I’m at the point that walking longer doesn’t provide much of a challenge beyond finding the time.
Polt
This week, we’re to talk about Beyond BC&RL3. When this is over, I’ll not fall back into my old ways, cause I don’t want my doctor yelling at me. I got onto this diet I’m on because of her, and luckily it just happened to correspond with this competition. Weight loss, though, is only a secondary goal. My main goal is to get my sugar levels down. And that I’ll continue, hopefully, well after the contest. And in doing so, I’ll eventually end up all sleek, and svelte, and sexy-like. Just like this photo!
Mikey
The graph here is what I had hoped my weight loss would look like. It hasn’t yet, but I have started to lose weight again! Ty and I are continuing to two a few things to maximize our loss and minimize our waists: cooking healthier foods rather than doing the NYC thing of ordering in ALL THE TIME, substituting seltzer for tonic (don’t laugh…it works. I lost 5 lbs after making that small change), and trying to get more of the dreaded exercise.
And now the week’s results:
Stay tuned each Thursday for the stunning weight-loss success stories of our eight contestants. Who will win this year’s competition? Find out on May 31st … just in time for bikini season!
Our eleventh week is complete! Today our contestants celebrate eleven weeks into the cockiest and rudest weight loss competition evahhhh! It’s Biggest Cock & Rudest Loser 3!
Rosie O’Donnell once admitted to stopping at multiple Waffle Houses because she was embarrassed to order so much food from a single fast-food restaurant. This week I asked each of the contestants for a pre-diet embarrassing admission. Here’s what they had to say…
Michelle M.
Well, there was that one time I ate 10 tacos…
Ryan
I’m most embarrassed with how I would get a large bag of candy, eat until the sugar made me feel sick, and then sometimes keep eating. I’m also not proud of how I would sometimes substitute a bag of Doritos or a pint of Ben & Jerry’s for a meal or how quickly I could go through a box of donuts.
Polt
So this week, we’re detailing an something embarrassing we did before we started the contest. Hmm, well being over 300 12 years ago was pretty embarrassing in an of itself. But let’s see, what else embarrassing did I do? Oh yeah, well a few years back, mom made me a Boston Cream Pie for my birthday. She, dad and I each had a slice when she gave it to me. Then I took it home. By 8:00 the next evening, the entire pie was gone. It was simply THAT good, ate the whole damn thing in less than a day. Not the first time either. But in my defense, Mama Polt makes a HELLUVA delicious pie! (and I don’t have any photos of her pies, so the one I included in just a generic pie, which I’m sure tastes nowhere near as good as hers!)
Mikey
My shocking admission is that I love to eat ice cream and like Fat Betty I just can’t stop. You see that pint of Ben & Jerry’s? I could make that my bitch in about 20 minutes, no brain freeze, one spoon, pure bliss. Truth be told, I MISS IT SO FREAKIN MUCH.
Mr. Sombrero
Does a honey badger think some of his actions are embarrassing? Of course he doesn’t. He’s a honey badger. Does Mr. Sombrero think eating an entire tub of Twix ice cream… before dinner… is embarrassing? Probably not. He’s Mr. Sombrero. Wait… we’re suppose to be dieting? Ok, now I’m embarrassed to admit something…
TwoPi
I do all the cooking and grocery shopping for the family. One of the benefits (or risks) of grocery shopping alone is the opportunity to buy a “little treat” or snack for the drive home. For a while, I was craving Doritos, and each time at the grocery I’d buy a big bag of Doritos, and snarf them down on the drive home. (This might be two or three times per week at its worst.) At one point I had the brilliant idea to put wet wipes in the car to eliminate the tell-tale signs of Dorito snarfage, but in a cold weather climate this doesn’t work out so well. I might not have lost as much weight as my compatriots here, but BC&RL3 *did* help break me of my shameful Dorito habit.
Tam
I don’t think I’ve ever done something like that, not that I can think of. Although I have eaten my lunch in my office at 10:30 and then went and bought lunch in the cafeteria at 12:00. Sigh I’m more paranoid what people are thinking when I legitimately buy food for more than me. If you go to the drive-thru and order two burgers and fries (both the same) and you get to the window and there is only you in the car, are they wondering what kind of a pig I am or assuming I’m taking it home for someone? When I order a large pizza I hope they realize I’m not home alone, I could have five kids running around in there. So I’m conscious of how it looks when I order/buy certain foods, but I’ve not done too much sneaky food eating/buying.
Adam
Much like Tam, I’m also incredibly paranoid about being judged. A few years ago (when I was vegetarian) I was feeling blue and put myself on a a steady diet of veggie subs, Doritos, Entenmann’s chocolate chip cookies and Peanut M&M’s. I’d stop at the local Wawa convenience store almost every day after work and stock up on the evening’s depression binge. I’d often feel embarrassed by the mass of junk food that I was buying, and would somehow convince myself that if I bought two drinks, the cashier would think my purchase was for multiple people. It was convenient because then I had two drinks to wash down all the crap!
And now the week’s results:
Stay tuned each Thursday for the stunning weight-loss success stories of our eight contestants. Who will win this year’s competition? Find out on May 31st … just in time for bikini season!
ATTENTION Biggest Cock & Rudest Loser 3 Participants: Don’t Forget! Your blurb, percentage (or weight) and photo for this week’s Biggest Cock & Rudest Loser 3, are due at 5PM EST today!
This Week’s Theme: “EMBARRASSING ADMISSION” – Rosie O’Donnell once admitted to stopping at multiple Waffle Houses because she was embarrassed to order so much food from a single fast-food restaurant. Tell us something embarrassing that you used to do BEFORE your diet began. Submit a photo that illustrates your ‘embarrassing admission’.
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Biggest Cock & Rudest Loser 3: Week 11
As we begin the 11th week of BC&RL3, we take a peek at somewhere BC&RL has never gone before … into the cupboards! Much like our ‘in the fridge’ week, this week we take a look inside each of our contestant’s cupboards, pantries, or wherever they’re storing their non-refrigerated foodstuff. Check it out!
TwoPi
Our pantry is a converted broom closet. The top two shelves hold liquids (olive oil, vinegar, key lime juice, Thai fish sauce, etc…), while the next two shelves are mostly canned goods (lots of pineapple, tuna, various soups, tomatoes, etc….) The lowest shelves (mostly off camera) have non-food items, such as trash bags and various food storage items. I mostly use the stuff on the top two shelves; the rest of the pantry mostly consists of forgotten items lost in the transition from grocery bag to dust bin.
Tam
This could be called my Carb Cupboard (sorry Polt). This picture shows it tidier than it sometimes is, and messier than at other times. The top shelf is carb heaven – pasta, noodles, mac & cheese and rice; second shelf is canned goods and things like drink mixes; third shelf is breakfast stuff – cereal, juice (and ice-cream toppings – not so breakfasty); fourth shelf is snacks – crackers, chips, popcorn, little fruit cup thingies for lunches; bottom shelf is trash bags, light bulbs and potatoes. There is a shelf above you can’t see, but it is empty juice jugs, vases and booze. Ahem.
Mr. Sombrero
All I have are spices and shit. I’m going for the win. Vote for me in The Messiest A** Pantry – 2012. Yeah, no comment.
Ryan
Most of my non-refrigerated food is in these three cupboards. The others contain some spices and extra dry goods. Note the supply of oatmeal, raisins, and cinnamon ready for breakfast.
Polt
So this week, we’re talking what’s in our cupboard. In my cupboards all I have are dishes, glasses, Tupperware, that sorta stuff. I do have a pantry, but I use that for storage purposes. And I have a series of shelves in the cellar way, but they only contain some cans of soup, green beans, spaghetti-O’s, fruit salad, some salad dressing and a lonely can of tuna. Most of my non-refrigerated food I just store on my counter top like so: cereal, popcorn, peanut butter, whole wheat bread, spray cheese, sugarless caramels, Pringles, and Crystal Light. I don’t eat the pathetic looking plant there, I’ve had Janis for about ten years, longer than any plant I’ve ever had.
Mikey
You can see that I keep my kitchen cabinets better stocked than the fridge. That is influenced by the fact that I am obsessed with having every possible spice on hand in case it ever comes up in an exotic recipe. AND I DON’T HAVE THEM ALL YET. You can also see healthy olive oil on one shelf and brown rice on the other. See…I am trying.
Michelle M.
We have a tiny cupboard. Here’s what’s in it.
1. coffee (for Harry) tea and hot chocolate
2. canned vegetables and beans
3. nuts, popcorn, raisins, nuts and emergency chocolate
4. rice, pasta, lentils, Asian noodles
5. bread, soup, vegetable and chicken broth
6. cooking oils, hot sauce, pasta sauce, peanut butter
7. cereal, granola bars, pretzels, crackers
8. baking stuff
9. Harry’s breakfast fixings (oatmeal and stuff to make it taste good).
Adam
Left top: teas, oatmeal, olive oil. Left middle: Emergen-C, random ingredients, soy sauce, pepper oil, balsamic vinegar. Bottom left: lots of spices and seasonings. Top right: flour, rice, sugars. Middle right: Indian food, raisins, Maggi noodles, lentils, popcorn. Bottom right: canned veggies, sauces and vitamins.
And now the week’s results:
Stay tuned each Thursday for the stunning weight-loss success stories of our eight contestants. Who will win this year’s competition? Find out on May 31st … just in time for bikini season!
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