Our seventh week is complete! Today our contestants celebrate seven weeks into the cockiest and rudest weight loss competition evahhhh! It’s Biggest Cock & Rudest Loser 3!
Temptation is something that plagues every dieter. Whether it’s food, laziness, or something else — sometimes it’s all you’re thinking about when you should be eating healthy and exercising. What tempts our contestants? We’re about to find out!
Michelle M.
It doesn’t take much to tempt me away from exercising. But the couch/television and internet are the worst offenders. “All I wanna do is stay home and eat chips” – little Mackenzie (my favorite) from Dance Moms.
Polt
So this week’s theme is Temptation: what’s tempting me. Well, I’ve not had many chips in the last month, and I used to have them with nearly every meal, so they’re kinda tempting. And what do chips go best with but a delicious sub? Yeah, I’d like to have one of those, thick roll piled high with meat, mayo, lettuce, onions….yum. But what’s REALLY tempting me? PASTA! I’d give my left nut for a big bowl of fettuccine, covered in sauce and loaded with meatballs. YUM! For me now, pasta is the face of evil, tempting me so, yet SO wrong for me!
TwoPi
“I always avoid temptation, unless I can’t resist it.” Looking for images related to this quote, I stumbled on the cover of the sheet music for “Ev’rybody Shimmies Now”, which I can’t help but hear being sung by the Beach Boys. Apparently the Shimmy was a popular dance in the 1920s. Sorry, I got distracted. What is the theme again? Oh. I guess I’m tempted by the idea of the Beach Boys recording Mae West songs.
Tam
So, my biggest weakness is the damn computer. I’m either reading, writing something, or surfing the net. Sigh. I should be going for a walk, doing my laundry, something that actually requires burning more calories than typing. As for food weaknesses, lately it’s been ice-cream. (Not the Starbucks but the picture was close. I hate Starbuck.) It’s not a good thing when Ben & Jerry’s is on sale. I can resist when it’s $7/container, but $4 … not so much. Doesn’t help that this week is water retention week. Stupid girl problems.
Ryan
This past week they’ve been having food trucks come to our offices. This has disrupted my diet not only because I’m probably eating more than I normally would for lunch but also because the difficulty of figuring out how much I ate discourages me from making sure what I have for the rest of the day fits within my calorie ranges.
Mr. Sombrero
Dear PB, you suck! I love you. That about sums it up.
Mikey
My temptation of the moment is pizza. I have given in to it twice this past week, which explains why I am fatter today than I was last week. 
Anyway…I vow (again!) to resist temptation again. OH and to get off my fat butt and work out.
Adam
All I want is a cookie — ALL I WANT IS A COOKIE!! Why are vegan cookies still so bad for you? I haven’t had cookies in forevz (at least 2 days) and I still cannot seem to lose any weight. It’s pathetic! I’m just awful!!
And now the week’s results:
Stay tuned each Thursday for the stunning weight-loss success stories of our eight contestants. Who will win this year’s competition? Find out on May 31st … just in time for bikini season!
Our third week is complete! Today our contestants celebrate three weeks into the cockiest and rudest weight loss competition evahhhh! It’s Biggest Cock & Rudest Loser 3!
Exercise is an important part of every weight-loss regimen. This week, the contestants were invited to tell us how they’ve exercised to help attain their weight-loss goals. Here’s what they said:
Mikey
The only exercise I have been able to get in the past two weeks has been walking to/from work, walking the dog, playing with the dog, and COUGHING. However, since my diet changes have resulted in my weight loss leveling off and since I am finally able to move around without hacking up a corner of my lungs, I am instituting an exercise regimen. I will be doing 30-45 min of cardio every other day for the near future. May my ass disappear.
Tam
The picture says it all. I really have not focused at all on exercise. I have really only been seriously participating in this challenge for about 10 days because of my trip, so right now I’m just paying attention to what I eat and how much of it. I’ve been faithfully logging my in-take on Spark People and I think for right now I need to focus on that until it becomes more second nature. If I starting thinking I must do this, and this, and this, I’m likely to do none of it. So that’s my rationale for sitting my ass on the couch and doing nothing.
Ryan
The majority of my exercise is walking. Commuting to work gives me a baseline of twelve miles each week. I’ve also started using a walk tracking app on my phone. I love it because I can take a spontaneous path and not have to worry about remembering every detour when I map the route when I get home. I’ve also been doing some calisthenics, but I haven’t been disciplined about it. Usually, it amounts to doing some pushups while my oatmeal is cooking if I don’t have any dishes to wash.
Adam
I’ve been a lazy piece of shit for the past week. I’m paying for a gym membership … I really need to go to the gym. Ugh. But I’m just so damn lazy. bloooooooooooooooooob. Maybe my arm muscles will get bigger if I buy heavier forks. And spoons.
Polt
This week we’re supposed to talk about exercise. I don’t feel the need to change my exercise regime, as I was getting quite a bit of exercise before we started. I mean, several times in an evening, I had to drag my fat ass off the couch, ya know, to get something to eat, or to pee or whatever. And at least once a day, I have to roll my fat ass outta bed…NOT an easy thing to do, I assure you. So as long as I keep working out like that, I should do really well.
TwoPi
Slow and steady wins the race! Unless you’re pedaling on a stationary bike, that is. Or not, as I’ve been lately. I couldn’t find the “Add dust and cobwebs” filter in Photoshop… but the actual stationary bike and elliptical machine sitting in my attic are gathering more dust than sweat these days. I’ve been struggling with hip and back trouble for months, and at the moment my most strenuous activity is walking (when I’m able) and physical therapy (when I’m good and I remember). But I know I’ve got the equipment waiting there to be dusted off, and surely some day…
Michelle M.
I haven’t exercised at all. I’VE BEEN SICK! I did get my hula hoop, Thighmaster, in-line skates and dumbbells out of the garage for this photo, so that should count for something. Other exercise I haven’t been doing: walking around the lake, riding my bike and Zumba (which I intend to buy/do one day, so that should also count for something).
Mr. Sombrero
Mr. Sombrero has been feeling a bit under the weather past few days and he had to skip a few classes. But on a good week his exercise regimen consist of yoga, calisthenics, and ton, like 7 miles a day, of walking. And somehow I still don’t see the results fast enough. Damn you quesadillas!!!
And now the week’s results:
Stay tuned each Thursday for the stunning weight-loss success stories of our eight contestants. Who will win this year’s competition? Find out on May 31st … just in time for bikini season!
Last Saturday, a few members of the Puntabugang C&R Army converged upon New York City for a festive evening of friends, vegan (and non-vegan) treats, booze, caffeine-free diet soda, pop music and great conversation. A wonderful time was had by all, which you can see exhibited in the following 60 out-of-focus, grainy, and often odd photos (some of which were masterfully taken by “The Kid”). Enjoy!
In attendance:
Chris D., FDot, “The Kid”, Kris, Mikey, Mr. Sombrero, Tam, Jeopardy! champion Ty, & Adam
Not in attendance:
Polt (says I have a sultry and sexy voice), Craig (was curled up in his bed crying over his urinary tract infection), Jere (he was too busy watching American Horror Story), and everyone else.
“Fear (of vaginas) always springs from ignorance.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson
“Misunderstanding … arising from ignorance breeds fear, and fear remains the greatest enemy of peace (and vaginas). – Lester B. Pearson
Recently our very own Adam shared with us a mean, offensive and misguided post about everyone’s friend – the vagina. His obvious distaste and ignorance is distasteful and ignorant! Vaginas aren’t scary – I’m rather attached to mine. Why, the vagina is a miraculous body part which has been celebrated in fashion:
cinema:
the theater:
pop culture:
cuisine:
and art:
Without vaginas, none of us would even be here! Plus, they’re warm and
cozy and perfect to laze around in on a chilly day:
Also, the vagina is a hero! Not a zero.
So, while Adam is free (and encouraged!) to abstain from the ladyflower, I do hope that he will one day overcome his phobia. Or at least stop spewing intolerance and misinformation – such as the following:
1. They’re foreign! What is that thing? It looks like a mess of flappy skin with a hole in the middle. Ew!
They’re not foreign at all. Mine is a U.S. citizen who can vote, run up debt, make fun of Canada, become obese and start wars in the middle east. And Adam, you have a floppy thing with a hole in the middle, too. By the way, did you take biology? You’ve got a lot more than the vagina in your diagram.
2. What’s in there? Teeth? I saw that movie … it was quite eye-opening.
That’s just a myth. Like lightning never striking twice, gum hanging around in your stomach for seven years, Sasquatch or the Puntabuschlong (sorry Polt).
3. They’re smelly! I hear that they often smell of fish sticks and cabbage that has sat in the sun for a bit too long.
Uh, maybe if you never bathe. Mine smells like honeysuckle, cinnamon and baby unicorns.
4. Yeast infections! I’m not even sure what a yeast infection is … but ew! Wash that thing out once and a while!
Men get yeast infections too. I’ve never had one. But then, I don’t bake bread in my vagina.
5. Periods! Menstrual cycle? Yuck! Why is there blood dripping out of your vagina? If it’s bleeding, then maybe you should just let it die!
Oh, but periods are so much fun. Cramps, bloating, mood swings, fatigue…maybe you’re just jealous. Too bad they only last 38 years on average (more or less).
6. Babies come out of them! WTF! How does a freak’n baby fit through that hole? That’s disgusting!
It’s the circle of life Adam! Actually I’m surprised you don’t think babies come from storks or cabbage patches. And disgusting? Perhaps (and don’t forget painful).
7. The clitoris. Straight guys can’t find it … I don’t even know what it is! And upon research … is it just a tiny penis?
For some straight guys this is very true. And very sad. Tragic even.
8. Queefs? My dick never farts … why are there farts coming from your frontside?
Ask Oprah. She seems pretty excited about hers.
9. How do they work? Where does the penis go? Where does the pee come out of? Can Google Maps help me? Please?
Google Maps is not going to help. Try Wikipedia.
10. It’s not a penis! ‘Nuff said!
Can’t argue with that. But, like it or not, the vagina is here to stay. So perhaps we should stop looking at the vagina as an object of horror and instead, embrace this misunderstood bit of anatomy with open arms.
And who knows. Maybe someday Adam will learn to love pussy…
 | Anonymous on 10 Reasons Why Vaginas Are… |
 | Chris Crépon on 10 Reasons Why Vaginas Are… |
 | Polt on BC&RL 2013: Part 2 |
 | Mikey on BC&RL 2013: Part 2 |
 | Michelle M. on BC&RL 2013: Part 2 |
 | The Incredibly Shrin… on BC&RL 2013: Part 2 |
| Mikey on BC&RL 2013: Part 2 |
| poltguy on BC&RL 2013: Part 2 |
Yay! Boo!
*The idea for this post was inspired by vuboq. Thanks vuboq!
Yay! I was excited about the new Hershey’s Air Delight chocolate bar – I thought it
would be like the Choco’Lite bars of yore. Chocolatey, yet airy.
Boo! But it wasn’t. It just tasted like chocolate chalk.
Yay! And then I received my ugly purse prize in the mail and all was right
with the world (not shown – the 3 candy bars Harry and I immediately ate).
Yay! House is on tonight!
Boo! This is the last season of House.
Boo! I’m out of my favorite lipstick (Maybelline Moisture Whip* #370 – Toast) and they’ve discontinued it!
Yay! I found one that looks fairly similar (Maybelline Colorsensational #275 – Crazy for Coffee).
*Know who else uses Moisture Whip – that’s right, Wonder Woman!
Yay! I get to use more colors in my painting class
Boo! I still have to paint those ugly bottles (the yellow square is the area I’m painting).
Boo! I’ll have to trade in yummy potato chips for yucky rice cakes.
Yay! I will be able to fit into my jeans again.
Boo! I’ll have to trade in sitting on the couch for exercising.
Yay! I’ll feel and look better!
Boo! I’ll have to keep eating right and exercising for the rest of my days.
Yay! I have 3 more days to stuff myself with junk food!
I guess you can’t have the silver linings without the clouds.
What were the ups and downs of your week? Let me know in comments!
Rate this:
Share this:
Like this: