Monday
Harry had hockey, so Cooper and I watched The Muppets. My favorite muppet is Floyd. He’s so cool and laid back – the opposite of me! Cooper’s favorite muppet was the little girl giving Walter the side-eye. Cooper is also a big Chris Cooper fan.
Did I have a soda, candy and popcorn while watching the movie? No. I had celery sticks, apple sauce and water.
Tuesday
I checked in on the roses. After finally getting rid of whatever was eating holes in the leaves, our five rose bushes came down with powdery mildew. And just when they were looking so healthy and lush and were starting to bloom. I had to cut them all back. Boo.
I did my ironing. I hate ironing. Here is a shirt that is supposed to be “no iron”. Grrrr.
Wednesday
Wednesday we got in the car and headed to Temecula‘s wine country (about an hour north of us). Last year Harry gave me a horseback ride and wine tasting lunch for my birthday. We finally got around to doing it. My horse’s name was Rusty and Harry’s was Quincy. It was super hot, and my horse kept fighting me to be in front of the guide, but it was fun!
After our ride we went to Wilson Creek Winery for our wine tasting. Woo hoo!
Then we had lunch. The restaurant was outdoors. They had misters which was lovely on such a hot day. The rolls had cheese on them (yuck), but the crackers were pretty good. I had a (steak) salad.
Thursday
Thursday was the last day of my painting class. Some of the students brought in snacks. One of them brought chocolate cupcakes. I took one because it would have been rude of me to refuse.
Here is the painting I’ve been working on. It’s Franz Marc‘s Red Horses. It’s a little off because the dimensions of my canvas are different from the original. And I still have a lot yet to do. I’m the queen of unfinished projects, but hopefully I’ll keep working on it.
Friday
After dinner at a Mexican restaurant with friends (I had 2 daiquiris, peach and strawberry), Harry and I decided to go to the local dive bar to drink some more. He had beer and some kind of cinnamon shot thing. I had 2 rum and cokes. They have a neat jukebox with bajillions of songs.
We killed zombies, played air hockey (Harry won) and pool (Harry won – maybe it’s because I played this way…).
Saturday
We went to our local farmer’s market. We got some fresh, organic California strawberries.
Then we took the car in to Pep Boys because the air conditioner broke. This would be their second go round trying to fix it (this isn’t our first experience having to bring the car back for a re-repair). After we got there they told us to bring it back another day (after just telling us on the phone to bring it in). After we get it fixed we shall never, ever return. Manny, Mo and Jack can suck it.
We decided to have lunch in Hillcrest. We went to Freebirds World Burrito. It’s kinda like Chipotle, but with more options. Check out my huge burrito:
We sat outside and guess what music was playing? “Black Betty”. I kid you not. Also, I totally didn’t have a brownie or cookie. Willpower!
On the way home we saw this bar. It reminded me of Adam.
Sunday
I didn’t do much. I can’t find my brand of shampoo anywhere anymore, so I used this brand for the first time. It smells like flowers and fruit salad.
I also read, played on the computer and watched tv. Then I worked on Cooper’s exciting post for Monday.
Check out Cooper’s Corner for a very important announcement: http://cooperscorner.info/
So how was your weekend? And who is your favorite muppet? Let me know in comments!
1. News interns caught on camera!
2. Harry!
Instead of doing it himself (which he is capable of, but would never get around to), Harry (finally) decided to hire a drywaller to patch up the holes and window frames in my office and in our bedroom. Hallelujah!
3. The Twilight Video Game!
4. Guest posts!
Posting is hard. Sometimes you just need a break. Adam came up with a guest post for me for Cooper’s Corner. Check it out! And if you would like to guest post for me (either here or on Cooper’s Corner, let me know! I’m lazy and not ashamed to admit it.)
5. The Girl Scout Thin Mints candy bar!
Nestle is teaming up with the Girl Scouts to produce a Thin Mints inspired candy bar. It may show up in June. I should be done with my diet by then.
Runners up: Homemade chicken noodle soup on a rainy day, library hold lists, hot water bottles, Canada Dry Ginger Ale, getting all your laundry done, and the My First Wonder Woman book (which I bought for my 3 year old niece [they have a Superman one too, Polt]).
Let’s face it: the human body is flawed. It gets injured. It breaks, it bleeds, it dies. But until we can upload our consciousnesses into indestructible robot avatars, we’re doomed to get hurt. How many injuries has your meat-sack sustained? Let’s find out!
The rules are simple: For each question that you answer ‘yes’ to, give yourself a single point. When you reach the end of the quiz, add up your points and post your total in the comments.
Have You Ever?!1. Have you ever had a muscle sprain or strain?
2. Have you ever torn ligament or tendon?
3. Have you ever fractured a bone?
4. Have you ever fractured a bone so badly that it broke through the skin?
5. Have you ever injured a knee, ankle or wrist?
6. Have you ever injured your back?
7. Have you ever sustained an electric shock?
8. Have you ever been knocked unconscious?
9. Have you ever needed pain killer medication?
10. Have you ever dislocated a joint?
11. Have you ever had a head wound?
12. Have you ever needed surgery?
13. Have you ever needed stitches?
14. Have you ever suffered a traumatic brain injury?
15. Have you ever suffered a spinal cord injury?
16. Have you ever needed to use crutches?
17. Have you ever needed a cast?
18. Have you ever needed to go to the emergency room?
19. Have you ever needed to go to the hospital in an ambulance?
20. Have you ever been punched in the face?
21. Have you ever been stabbed?
22. Have you ever been shot by a gun?
23. Have you ever lost a limb?
24. Have you ever been decapitated?
25. Have you ever died?
Tell us your total and war stories in the comments!
February 14th – 21st is National Condom Week! Originating at the University of California, Berkeley in the ‘70s, National Condom Week is a great time to focus on the importance of safe sex. With Valentine’s Day serving as the kick-off for National Condom Week, we’re reminded to love ourselves enough to prevent the spread of sexually-transmitted diseases and avoid unintended pregnancy. (source)
The rules to Have You Ever?! are simple: For each question that you answer ‘yes’ to, give yourself a single point. When you reach the end of the quiz, add up your points and post your total in the comments.
Have You Ever?!
1. Have you ever worn a condom?
2. Have you ever purchased condoms?
3. Have you ever brought a friend with you while you bought condoms to make it less uncomfortable?
4. Have you ever bought condoms while with the person you intended on using them with?
5. Have you ever witnessed a condom being put onto a banana in school?
6. Have you ever used a female condom?
7. Have you ever stretched a condom over your head?
8. Have you ever inflated a condom like a balloon?
9. Have you ever used condoms as water balloons?
10. Have you ever thrown away condoms because they had expired?
11. Have you ever practiced putting on a condom by yourself so you were better at it when the opportunity arose later on?
12. Have you ever masturbated while wearing a condom?
13. Have you ever ejaculated into a condom?
14. Have you ever used a condom with a sex toy?
15. Have you ever put a condom onto someone else?
16. Have you ever performed fellatio on partner that was wearing a condom?
17. Have you ever engaged in sexual activities while wearing a condom?
18. Have you ever engaged in sexual activities while a partner was wearing a condom?
19. Have you or a partner ever worn a condom that was ribbed for his or her pleasure?
20. Have you or a partner ever worn a glow-in-the-dark condom?
21. Have you or a partner ever worn a flavored condom?
22. Have you or a partner ever worn a Magnum (or other brand extra-large) condom?
23. Have you or a partner ever broken a condom while engaging in sexual activities?
24. Have you ever drank ejaculate out of a condom?
25. Have you ever saved a used condom?
Summer is in full swing, and with the warm season comes something that we all look forward to: Summer Vacations! This week’s Have You Ever?! quiz focuses on that more-affordable vacation option: The Road Trip. Most of us have taken road trips at some point in our lives, whether it’s a trip that’s a few hours away, or a trip across the country. Whatever the length of your travels, we’re about to find out what kind of adventures you’ve had.
The rules are simple: For each question that you answer ‘yes’ to, give yourself a single point. 
When you reach the end of the quiz, add up your points and post your total in the comments.
1. Have you ever ever gone on a road trip?
2. Have you ever gone on a road trip with no set destinations?
3. Have you ever taken a driving break, just to stretch your legs?
4. Have you ever sang 100 Bottles of Beer on the Wall, all the way through?
5. Have you ever made a pit stop to use some free (or stolen) wi-fi?
6. Have you ever gotten lost?
7. Have you ever driven straight through the night?
8. Have you ever spent the night at a sleazy motel?
9. Have you ever spent the night in your car?
10. Have you ever stayed at a campground for the night?
11. Have you ever camped out by the side of the road?
12. Have you ever consumed an entire meal while driving?
13. Have you ever not been able to find somewhere to eat?
14. Have you ever visited more than 3 states in a single day?
15. Have you ever visited more than 7 states in a single trip?
16. Have you ever gone days without a shower?
17. Have you ever showered at a coin-operated shower?
18. Have you ever dried laundry or towels by laying them out in the sun or hanging out the window of a moving car?
19. Have you ever peed in a container while driving?
20. Have you ever pooped on the side of the road?
21. Have you ever run out of gas or broken down?
22. Have you ever had an entire argument and then made up with your travel companion without ever leaving the car?
23. Have you ever picked up a hitchhiker?
24. Have you ever had sex with a hitchhiker or stranger that you met on the road?
25. Have you ever had sex at a rest stop or on the side of the road?
Take a break from driving and tell us your total in the comments!
It’s been a rough week for me so far. Sure it’s only Wednesday, but in addition to long hours at the office (including some incredibly long hours learning a super-boring new newspaper classified layout system), I’ve been driving to a friend’s house most nights to keep an eye on her cat (whose name is “The Whore”). And there’s still a lot of classified training and cat shit scooping ahead of me for the rest of the week. My friend is on her honeymoon at the Galapagos Islands for almost two weeks, and I’m driving way too many miles to clean a spiteful cat’s shit off of her living room carpet. Is it just me, or did I get the short end of the straw?
All this pet-sitting got me to wondering … what sorts of things do people do at their friend’s and family’s houses while sitting? Today’s Have You Ever quiz applies to pet sitting, plant sitting, house sitting, and any other kind of sitting that you can think of. But for the sake of my sanity, we’ll just call it all “house sitting.”
The rules are simple: For each question that you answer ‘yes’ to, give yourself a single point. When you reach the end of the quiz, add up your points and post your total in the comments.
Have You Ever?!1. Have you ever house sat for a friend or family member?
2. Have you ever agreed to house sit and then forgotten to go to their house?
3. Have you ever house sat for a fee?
4. Have you ever regretted agreeing to house sit?
5. Have you ever forgotten to do one of your assigned tasks while house sitting?
6. Have you ever snacked on food that didn’t belong to you while house sitting?
7. Have you ever snooped around the house while house sitting?
8. Have you ever broken something important while house sitting?
9. Have you ever stolen something while house sitting?
10. Have you ever stained something while house sitting? (booze, bodily fluids, etc.)
11. Have you ever used a computer while house sitting for nefarious purposes? (downloading porn, performing on a webcam, etc.)
12. Have you ever tried on someone else’s clothes while house sitting?
13. Have you ever accidentally left the lights on, left the door unlocked, or left windows open while house sitting?
14. Have you ever experienced a household emergency while house sitting? (burst pipe, broken A/C, etc.)
15. Have you ever experienced an emergency with a pet while house sitting? (injury, illness, etc.)
16. Have you ever forgotten to feed or water a pet while house sitting?
17. Have you ever killed plants or garden while house sitting?
18. Have you ever killed a pet while house sitting?
19. Have you ever brought a friend along while house sitting?
20. Have you ever thrown a party while house sitting?
21. Have you ever had sex in the house while house sitting?
22. Have you ever had neighbors call the police on you while house sitting?
23. Have you ever discovered that the house was robbed while house sitting?
24. Have you ever been caught for and/or called out on any of these offenses after house sitting?
25. Have you ever ended a friendship based on something that happened while you were house sitting?
Have you ever done anything else while house sitting? Tell me all about it in the comments — and don’t forget to post your total points, too!
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10 Reasons Why I Might Dislike You On Facebook
You can’t stop posting photos of your children
You constantly post photos of sick/sad/dying animals
You do nothing but talk about sports 24/7
Your politics are stupid
You complain constantly
You post a photo of every meal that you eat
You are constantly fishing for pity
You are constantly fishing for compliments
You are wayyyy too attractive
You are way happier than me
So what bugs you on Facebook? (And don’t forget to follow Cocky&Rude!)
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