Here are ten things that CREEP me the hell out:
Old timey dolls. What were people thinking in the olden days? Were they trying to scare their children to death? Who would want to wake up to see those evil little faces staring at you? The one above wants to swallow my soul.
Speaking of scaring children to death, jack in the boxes are another way to do it.
The anticipation of that thing popping out is enough to give me a heart attack.
Mayonnaise. SO GROSS! Barf!
Eyeballs. Specifically, touching or operating on them. The Lasik scene from Final Destination 5 almost did me in.
Bar soap*. Especially that slimy gunk between the bar of soap and the soap dish. Gag!
*More on this on a future post.
Mummies. I DON’T WANT TO SEE THAT! EVER! Put that thing back where you found it! (Plus, they carry curses).
Mold, eeeeeeeeeeeew!
Long toenails. Revolting! Clip that shiz before I lose my lunch!
(Also gross: long fingernails on men and those Lamisil toe fungus commercials).
Candle wax on birthday cake. And it gets on the best part – the frosting! I always worry that someone is going to blow too hard on the candles and spray that damn wax everywhere. If I’m in charge of candles, I put them all in one corner so the rest of the cake doesn’t get wax cooties.
Roaches. make. my. skin. Crawl.
So there you have it – ten things that I find utterly disgusting. Runners up were: hairy drain clogs,
hoarders, John Malkovich, porta potties and rotting, never brushed teeth.
What creeps you out? Let me know in comments!
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If a nail is long enough to bend, it is too long regardless of whether it is on a hand or a foot. Any object that hits them is punishment for that sin.
Dirty, cracked feet in flip flops also creep me out.
My buddy Omar refers to uncunt dicks as “Demonic Jack in the Boxes….” That’s kind of the same thing right?
As for eyeballs, there’s a part in this game Dead Space 2 where you have to control a needle that you use to pierce your characters own eye … good times! /shakes uncontrollably
Wouldn’t all gay men have uncunt dicks, as they generally don’t go near vaginas?
HUGS…
HOW DO YOU NOT LIKE MAYO?!
I like mayo, but won’t eat it. When you think about and look at it, it is kinda gross. Best if it’s hidden in something else.
When I’m done making a sandwich, I lick the knife I used to spread the mayo sexily.
I just barfed on my keyboard.
I just barfed on Mr. Sombrero. He loved it.
You’re the only one to make a mayo bikini a la Chris Evans in Not Another Teen Movie.
Awesome!
You, Kristen and I have a lot in common. I don’t mind candle wax or mummies, but otherwise, creepy. Those toe nails are just disgusting. How could you go out in public like that? Do you strive to be a tree moneky? Someone who climbs palm trees and fetch coconuts so you need the grip? Ugh.
Googling images for “long toenails” was horrifying.
I with You on about half the list. In addition id add snot, the crust that forms on the spout of plastic condiment containers if you don’t clean them every time, the entire thought of any and all things menstral, the slime trails of slugs (and slugs themselves, I guess) and Michelle Bachman.
HUGS…
I believe it’s menstrual, unless you meant minstral, and those buggers are nearly as bad as mimes.
Ooh – slugs is a good one. Yuck.
I’m with you on most of these (dolls, roaches, mummies, mold, nails and bar soap), but I LOVE MAYO. Eyeballs used to creep me out, until I started wearing contacts. Now they are just eyeballs..and i’m tepid on jack-in-the-boxes.
Tepid. Excellent word.
I wear contacts, too. That kind of touching is okay – it’s the surgery/needle stuff that eeks me out.
Mayo is sooooooo nasty.
At least I’m not a flaccid fry anymore.
What crisped your fry? The toenail photo? Or the thought of the poppin’ Jack?
Mr. Sombrero.
I’m gonna cut you with your nasty mayonnaise knife!
I’m torn between rating this 5 stars because it’s funny or 1 star because it’s so gross.
Opening up a box filled with bugs creeps me out. I was working on the sprinkler system the other day, when I opened the control panel, there were about 20 earwigs huddled around the connections I needed to access. Then they started moving around. Creepy.
You best give your wife’s post 5 stars. just say’n.
Yeah!
What? Do you think I’m some kind of idiot? Something, something, Craig’s mayo knife.