Last week I listed 20 television characters I love. That means this week it’s time to list 20 characters I hate. And not “love to hate” like Pete Campbell from Mad Men or Ben from Lost. These are characters that I find annoying, lame, whiny, stupid or all of the above. It may be the way the actors are portraying them, or just the way the characters are written. Or maybe it’s the actor himself/herself. Whatever it is, they’re obnoxious and unwatchable.
Annie Romano from One Day At A Time. Overact much? YES!
Phil from Modern Family. He’s way too clownish and dopey.
Debra Messing as Grace and Molly and Julia and any other character she’s played. She is truly awful. She just seems so self aware. Another overactor.
Ivy from 90210. She’s so flat, mopey and morose. ALL the time.
Ross from Friends. What a drip.
Elmo. It’s the voice. It’s like nails on a chalkboard.
Angela Chase from My So Called Life. The angst, the awkwardness, the hair tucking behind the ear, the flannel shirts, the always hugging herself and saying “like” every other word. And how many Jordans are in your school anyway? Can’t you refer to Jordan by his first name only?
Clare Edwards from Degrassi. I’m not sure why I can’t stand Clare. Maybe it’s because she’s a drama queen. Or that she looks like a middle-aged woman in those awful school uniforms. I just know she bugs me.
Kramer from Seinfeld (sorry, Tam). Too weird, too slapsticky. Not my cup of tea.
Jennifer Love Hewitt as anyone in anything. It all started with her character on Party of Five. All that “cutesy” acting and the going around with her sleeves pulled over her hands drove me nuts. Cleavage + acting cutesy = bad actress!
Will Schuester on Glee. He’s so smarmy. And waaaay too into the Glee kids. I might hate him more than Sue Sylvester does.
Hope on Thirtysomething. Never happy. What a wet blanket.
Annie Camden from 7th Heaven. She always seemed so annoyed and kind of bitchy- with a little bit of Church lady thrown in for good measure.
Ally McBeal. Ugh. I couldn’t even make it through one episode.
Susan from Desperate Housewives. I detest her “adorable klutzy” schtick.
Dawn Summers from Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Whiny, petulant and useless.
Smurfette. That voice. I can’t smurfing stand it.
Ellis from Smash. He’s such a sneaky little weasel. And not in a fun way.
Declan Porter from Reven8e. His hair is way too big for his body. I call him the human Q-tip. He’s useless as far as I’m concerned. Every time he appears I want to shake my fist at the television (you called it, Craig).
Lori from The Walking Dead. She thinks all the women should be cookin’ and doing laundry – not kicking zombie butt. And she can’t even keep track of her own kid. Or drive!
So which characters make you want to throw something at the screen? Let me know in comments!
Our eighth week is complete! Today our contestants celebrate eight weeks into the cockiest and rudest weight loss competition evahhhh! It’s Biggest Cock & Rudest Loser 3!
People say that you should never sweat the small stuff. But sometimes it’s the little things that drive us crazy. This week we asked each of our contestants what one (or more) ‘little things’ are that bother them. Maybe it’s their blobby fat that hangs over their waist band, or the way that diet food always seems to taste awful. Here’s what they said:
Tam
When you say little things, I’ll take it literally. Why are little things so fattening? It’s only a few peanuts. They’re miniature M&Ms. It’s just dried cranberries. All of them JAMMED with calories (in addition to good things). All small food should have small calories. If you eat a huge burger, big calories. Tiny cookies, tiny calories. Why are these things not logical?
Mr. Sombrero
There are few things that bother Mr Sombrero. Number one is the scale. It hasn’t moved in weeks. What the frak scale?! I thought we were in this together?! Did Adam put you up to this? [no response] Whatever. Another thing that bothers Mr Sombrero is his full length mirror. I don’t like what I’m seeing. Yes I’m talking to you mirror. Don’t give me that fat look. You know what else bothers Mr S? That kid that lost his cupcakes. Yeah that Ryan kid. Showoff. I think I’ve seen some of his cupcakes hanging around my scale. And another thing, what is up with veggie farts. I mean seriously, enough is enough. And do they have to smell like hipster’s wool hat on a hot and humid urban August afternoon? Yeah these are some of my (least) favorite things…
Ryan
I’m getting tired of tracking everything. It’s the key to my success so far, but it gets really frustrating whenever I eat something outside of my normal routine. The uncertainty of how much food something contains can make planning the rest of the day pointless. This leads me to rely mostly on whether I feel hungry, but this leads to the temptation to let myself have what I want to eat even if I shouldn’t.
Michelle M.
One of the little things I hate is being a girl and trying to lose weight. It’s hard to stay on track when you automatically put on up to 5 pounds of water weight each month. You think you’re being good and the WHAM the numbers on the scale jump up. It’s so discouraging. And craving sugar and salty snacks doesn’t help. Stupid hormones.
TwoPi
What irritates me the most is having to pay attention to the bathroom scale once a week. Bad enough having to stand on the darned thing, which naturally gives out a little creaking noise, as in “Oh my GOHD how many of you ARE there?” Then there’s a number, which is never the number I remember from when I was in high school (roughly the last time in my life I stood on a bathroom scale on a regular basis). And finally, there’s the blasted comparison of this week’s number with last week’s number. Ugh. I feel like a schoolboy who just got called in front of the class and didn’t do his homework. Bleh.
Mikey
The little things I hate are the way my shirts fit and the way that my pants fit. I feel like ALL of my shirts are too small and I float around like the pink iceberg named Fat Betty. My pants however are loose enough that I need a belt, but my belt doesn’t have a hole at the right spot….so they are constantly sagging and showing my ample rear.
Adam
A little thing that I hate? Clothes that don’t fit. I’ve gained some weight in the last year — and now the shirts I wore last year aren’t fitting. Why can’t someone design clothing that grows with you? Or maybe I should just buy every available size of shirts that I like. That way one of ‘em will always fit! Think of all the plaid!!!
Polt
So this week we’re talking about the little things we hate. Writing these blurbs each week can be a pain, but I’ll not mention that. And I thought I’d actually have to force myself to be taking walks, but I find I enjoy them, and frankly, feel a bit guilty when I don’t take one at least every other day. No, I think what irritates me the most about this diet thing, is the lack of variety in the food I’m eating. I’m eating all the meat and veggies I want (not that I want, or even eat all that many), but after awhile, I’ve just gotten sick of steak. I’d really like to have a sub and some chips, or a big plate of steaming hot pasta and meatballs, or a huge greasy slice of pizza…but I cant. Steak and salad for me…thank you very much. Ah well, in the end it’ll be worth it, right?
And now the week’s results:
Stay tuned each Thursday for the stunning weight-loss success stories of our eight contestants. Who will win this year’s competition? Find out on May 31st … just in time for bikini season!
ATTENTION Biggest Cock & Rudest Loser 3 Participants: Don’t Forget! Your blurb, percentage (or weight) and photo for this week’s Biggest Cock & Rudest Loser 3, are due at 5PM EST today!
This Week’s Theme: “THE LITTLE THINGS YOU HATE” - Everyone is annoyed by something. In respect to Biggest Loser, what’s one (or more) ‘little things’ that bother you? Maybe it’s your blobby fat hanging over the waist band of your pants OR the way that diet food always tastes awful. Submit a photo that illustrates this week’s theme.
Some claim that the pet you choose can reveal a lot about your personality.
Is it true? Let’s find out…
Mikey & Ty: English Bulldog
“People who owned utility dogs, like English bulldogs …[are] more conscientious and extroverted.” (source)
Adam: Cat
“…A sensitive fella! And he’s not only sensitive, but just loves to send you photos of his cat all day long and post them on Facebook and Twitter. I’m not sure why this is, but guys with cats are prone to such things.” (source)
Mel: French Bulldog, 3 cats (also: 2.5 alpacas and 2 Shetland sheep)
“The owners … are expressive and full of personality. These people are often overachievers because they like a dog that is a bit of a challenge.” (source) “Cats inexplicably make you stand out as more and more insane with each additional feline you possess.” (source)
Michelle M.: Parakeet
If you “…fancy a smaller variety such as a Parakeet or Canary,
you tend to be softer-spoken with a gentle demeanor.” (source)
VUBOQ: Cat
“You are easy going, but independent just like your cat; however,
you do enjoy a little snuggle time from time to time.” (source)
Craig: Wants a cat
Cat people are “more likely to be open… Open people tend to be:
curious, creative, artistic & nontraditional thinkers.” (source)
John: (had) Rabbits
“The reason your man would have a pet rabbit is because he never had one when he was a kid, and now that he’s living on his own, he’s going to finally fulfill that dream. The rabbit’s name is probably something like “Rambo”or “Killer” to make up for the fact that he’s a dude who actually owns a fluffy bunny.” (source)
Tam & The Kid: 2 Cats & a Rabbit
“If you get stressed out easily, you may be a cat person. Cat people were, as a group, 12% more neurotic than dog people. Neurotic people are: easily stressed, anxious & worriers.” (source) Rabbit owners are nice, active and are great with long-term commitments. (source) (Note: I couldn’t find a photo of Tam’s pets)
Josh: Cat & Dog
“If he owns a dog, your man is loyal and can actually commit, because owning a dog is as close to having a child as it comes.” (source) “Cat people are loners who are less religious than non-cat owners, want instant gratification, are satisfied with their jobs and are socially conscious.” (source)
Mama Polt: fluffy little dog
“…You have a desire to nurture your tiny pets. You tend to enjoy accessorizing and your pet can be an extension of that quality. Maybe you just really love cats but are in denial. In any case, you love that you can take your small pooch with you almost anywhere. You are probably as cute and lovable as your puppy, but sometimes might be considered annoying.” (source)
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I Love Lucy, and Darlene, and Natalie, and Nellie, and Joan, etc., etc.
In case you didn’t know, I LOVE T.V. Here are some characters that have entertained me through the years.
Lucy, she was always coming up with those harebrained ideas and getting into trouble.
Lucille Ball was a comic genius.
Dr. Gregory House. He’s sarcastic, witty and smarter than everyone in the room.
I’m going to miss him when the season ends.
Spike from Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Who doesn’t love a bad boy? And one with an accent?
The Trio from Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Warren, Andrew and Jonathan were the funniest,
nerdiest villains to terrorize Sunnydale.
Pat MacDougall (Amy’s Mom), as played by Georgia Engel on Everybody Loves Raymond.
Soft spoken Pat stole every scene she was in.
Darlene from Roseanne. Sarcastic and mouthy – but never bratty,
Darlene was my favorite of the Conner kids.
Joan Harris (née Holloway) from Mad Men. Joan is the voice of reason in the crazy world of
Sterling Cooper Draper Pryce. And she can rock a pen necklace like nobody’s business.
Stewie Gilligan Griffin from Family Guy. Funniest diabolical baby ever.
Bill McNeal from NewsRadio. Bill was a hilarious self-centered and pompous
doofus played by the late, great Phil Hartman.
Everyone knows I love Fat Betty (blam ba blam), so it should come as no surprise that I adore Fat Monica
from Friends. Fat Monica was so innocent, cheery and enthusiastic – and always a treat to watch.
Sue Sylvester from Glee. Though the writers have her go off the rails sometimes, I still love her.
Constance from American Horror Story. She is so very, very awful. But I loved it. Jessica Lange did a wonderful job portraying her – making her both nasty and sympathetic.
Natalie Green from Facts of Life. My favorite of the Eastland girls. Upbeat Natalie was always ready with a wisecrack. Too bad Natalie’s spinoff never came to be.
Dennis Finch from Just Shoot Me. Such a sarcastic little schemer. LOVED him.
Dewey from Malcolm in the Middle. Dewey was often lost in the shuffle. Because of this he had these weird little adventures that none of the family ever knew about. Some Dewey highlights for me were the episode with his pet fly Tony, and his dance with babysitter Bea Arthur.
Lafayette Reynolds from True Blood. Another scene stealer. He’s a gay, short-order cooking, drug dealing, road crewing, make-up wearing, butt kicking, fine black man. And I haven’t watched the last season yet, so who knows what else he’s been up to.
Nellie Olson from Little House on the Prairie. Nasty Nellie – Alison Arngrim made her so fun to watch!
Hiro Nakamura from Heroes. It was nice to see someone actually enthused about their super powers.
Veronica Mars. Whip smart, cute and funny. I miss Veronica and her sleuthing.
Wonder Woman, as played by Lynda Carter. Beautiful, strong and a great role model. WHERE IS HER MOVIE??!!
So who are your favorite television characters? Let me know in comments!
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