If given the option, would you eat a delicious, sugary, icing-covered cupcake? Or would you eat a muffin — a dense, cakey, baked good, stuffed with fruit and pretending to be healthy … oh, and there’s no icing. The choice is very simple: anyone in their right mind would choose the cupcake. Another simple choice was who would win in the Cocky & Rude Fight Club battle of Muffin Man versus Ryan With A Cupcake. Without even trying, Ryan destroyed the Muffin Man, leaving only a single muffin crumb behind. The cupcake-love’n Californian scored 99% of the popular vote (75 votes), leaving the loser from Drury Lane with a measly 1% (1 vote). We at C&R believe that Ryan’s delicious icing was just too good to pass up.
‘Sup, losers? It’s me, Spring. I’ve been furious since Jere dissed my important semi-regular contribution to Cocky & Rude. What does Jer-Bear have against my Piss Puddle Game? Adam snapped this photo of my piss puddle last week, and I couldn’t wait to show you. It’s a freak’n work of art! Here’s one of my latest masterpieces. Tell me what you think it looks like in the comments. If you don’t comment, I’ll hunt you down and cut your face (once I’m done with Jere).
It is finally Friday. I don’t know if it was the oppressive heat, the insanity at work, or the return from my mini-vacation, but this has been the longest week on record. It must have lasted at least twenty days. Thankfully this long, boring work week has been filled with amazing videos for me to discover online. Yes, all five of this week’s top five things are videos. Why? Cuz…I like videos and cuz I didn’t find anything else to be really jaunty about.
Have you ever wondered what happens when wholesome European’s interact with the US supermarket shopping phenomenon known as Walmart? I had not before this week. That was until I stumbled upon this video of two Brits enjoying their first excursion to the land Sam.
MTV has been a trendsetter for over 30 years now. Everyone dressed like Madonna in the 80s because of MTV and now everyone laughs at New Jersey because of MTV. Well that last bit sorta started before MTV. Any who, back in 1995, MTV was on top of the latest trend called the internet. They have crazy popular celebrities like Sandra Bullock and some musicians no one remembers talking about how awesome and attractive the web is. They even have Newt Gingrich talking about porn. What more could you want?
One of my all time youtube obsessions is back. Remember the faux Chloe Sevigny who makes being Chloe so glamorous but accessible to use lowly people? She’s back and this time she’s talking grilled meat.
I insanely miss Doctor Who. Just as we were settling into a most amazing and incredible season they lopped it in half and made us wait FOREVER for more. I am grateful for any and all Who that crosses my path. When I saw the teaser for the seasons return, I was jumping for joy. Literally.
And finally this week, we have a video that might possibly be my favorite net phenom of all time. I have watched this video of an English Bulldog named Gus trying to have it all no fewer than twice a day since I discovered it. It is adorable, entertaining and hilarious. I hope you enjoy it over and over.
So that’s all the videos I can force you to watch this week: Brits at Walmart, MTV on the Net, Chloe does Barbecue, Doctor Who teases a return, and Gus the super adorable dog! What made your list?
Welcome to Cocky & Rude Fight Club! The rules to the game are simple. Each week we’ll introduce our fighters. We’ll do the leg work and help you analyze their strengths and weaknesses. Then we’ll put the results to vote. You’ll pick which combatant will decimate their opponent in the knock-down, drag-out brawl of Cocky & Rude Fight Club! Let’s meet this week’s fighters…
THE MUFFIN MAN
AKA / Alias / Nicknames: Mister Muffin Date of Birth: 1820 Place of Birth: England Nationality: British Hair Color: dark, balding Current Residence: Drury Lane Relationship Status: unknown Occupations (current and/or past): Baker, Man Height & Weight: unknown Favorite song:The Muffin Man Favorite Food: muffins Favorite Muffin Flavor: all Favorite Cupcake Flavor: none Known for: baking muffins, living on Drury Lane Catch Phrases: “Do you know the Muffin Man?” Claim to Fame: living on Drury Lane Favorite curse word: Drury
Do [or "Oh, do"] you know the muffin man, The muffin man, the muffin man, Do you know the muffin man, Who lives in Drury Lane? Yes [or "Oh, yes"], I know the muffin man, The muffin man, the muffin man, Yes, I know the muffin man, Who lives in Drury Lane. The Muffin Man’s secret weapons include: an endless supply of muffin, ovens set to 350°, cast iron muffin pans, and a mustache.
RYAN
AKA / Alias / Nicknames: Cupcake, Ryan With A Cupcake Date of Birth: 12/15/1981 Place of Birth: Rochester, MN Nationality: United States Hair Color: Brown Current Residence: La Jolla, CA Relationship Status: Single Occupations (current and/or past): Student Height & Weight: 6’5″ & 81% of January 1st Ryan Favorite Song: The Downtown Fiction – Thanks for Nothing Favorite Food: Ben & Jerry’s Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough Ice Cream Favorite Muffin Flavor: Apple Cinnamon Favorite Cupcake Flavor: Red Velvet Known for: Geeking out over physics/science, buying things Craig likes (except Transformers), picture of an insane robot dog Favorite curse word: Bollocks
Hailing from sunny California, Ryan spends his days geeking out over science that mere mortals (like us) will never ever begin to comprehend. He describes his accent as “Canadian according to a Mexican and not noticeable according to someone who was transiently in Minnesota.” Ryan was born in Minnesota, spent a brief portion of his childhood living in the land of cheese, and later moved to California to avoid the extreme heat and cold of the Midwest. He considers himself a cat person (although he does own a cat). Ryan’s secret weapons include an extensive knowledge of physics, an endless supply of cupcakes and cupcake icing, and an insane robot dog.
Who will win in the battle of MUFFIN vs. CUPCAKE? Will the Muffin Man beat Ryan over the head with a cast iron muffin pan? Or will Ryan defeat the Muffin Man with the powers of science? There’s only one rational way to decide which fighter will win this battle. We’re putting this no-holds-barred fight to a vote. The poll will be open for approximately 24 hours, and you may vote as many times as you want. That’s right — we’re not blocking repeat votes, so vote now and vote often for your favorite Cocky & Rude Fight Club opponent.
Check back on Sunday for the results!
Thanks to both Ryan & Michelle M. for your assistance with this post!
I’ve been driving a Honda Fit for the better part of three years. In that time, I’ve waved to nearly every other Honda Fit driver that I’ve passed in my travels. In my mind, it’s a ‘camaraderie’ sort of thing. We are all driving the same car, so why not say a quick hello to each other? A friendly passing wave, that’s all I want. Drivers of other car makes and models do it. Motorcycles do it … even bicyclers do it.
SO WHY WON’T THEY WAVE TO ME?
In three years, I can count on one hand how many return waves I’ve received. My favorite was a lady about six months ago that matched my speed in the lane next to me. With a giant smile, she emphatically waved at me and then pointed to her own car and then to mine. Marveling at fact that we were both driving the same car she… Okay, okay — maybe that lady was crazy. But at least she waved.
Seriously, why won’t they wave to me? Am I detestably ugly? Is it not obvious that we’re driving the same car? Is the average age of a Honda Fit driver too high (and female)? Do people just not do the ‘wave’ thing anymore? What is it? I’m developing a complex! I need to know!! Why do you think people won’t wave to me?!
And while we’re on the topic … have you ever been a car waver? Do people ever wave back?
If given the option, would you eat a delicious, sugary, icing-covered cupcake? Or would you eat a muffin — a dense, cakey, baked good, stuffed with fruit and pretending to be healthy … oh, and there’s no icing. The choice is very simple: anyone in their right mind would choose the cupcake. Another simple choice was who would win in the 
I’ve been 
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