Monthly Archives: February 2011

And the Cocky & Rude Prizes go to…

The ballots were processed by Hartwyk, Waterhorse & Pooper and kept strictly confidential until the ceremony. Well except for when I printed them all out and left them on my desk at the office for a few days, but I assure you they were not altered. We had twelve readers, bloggers, and commenters participate in the balloting and I know you are all dying to find out how you all did!

Mr Sombrero 8 out of 24

Polt & Tam 10 out of 24

Josh & Kristen 11 out of 24

Craig & VUBOQ 12 out of 24

Michelle 13 out of 24

FDot & Adam 14 out of 24
* I accidentally indicated that Adam only got 13 correct in an earlier version of this post. I have updated the post to indicate that he did as well as FDot, but not as well as me. I still rule.

Mikey & Brian 16 out of 24

Since Adam and I were only playing for fun, that makes our random reader Brian from Massachusetts the winner of this year’s Cocky & Rude Oscar Prize! I’m just grateful that I don’t have to figure out how to send something to Canada.

During our balloting, we also asked respondents to guess who they felt would be the best and worst dressed at the ceremony. By some random trick of the maths (read: more diverse responses were given for best dressed than worst dressed), by percentage Helena Bonham Carter was selected as most likely to be Best Dressed and Worst Dressed. How is this possible? Well of the 10 people who answered these questions, 3 voted that Helena would rule the roost with her divine style. Her closest competitor was Anne Hathaway who only had two votes. With the remaining votes divided up amongst Natalie Portman, Nicole Kidman, Amy Adams, Helen Mirren, & Joseph Gordon-Levitt, it was a simple percentage victory. In the Worst Dressed Category, 75% of responses indicated that Helena Bonham Carter would be the worst dressed with Hallee Steinfeld, Amy Adams and “who ever wins best sound mixing” as her only competition.

Who would have known that perennially best dressed candidates like Cate Blanchette & Nicole Kidman would fail us. Cate’s weird lilacy-pink dress gave us the appearance that someone had projectile vomited on her while she was holding a plate in front of her for protection. Shame on you Cate! Nicole’s outfit looked too space aged for the actress to pull off. Oh and how did she sit down in that thing anyway?

The Jury is still out on best dressed, but one of my favorites of the night was Anne Hathaway’s off the shoulder blue number toward the end of the ceremony. It was amazing.

So did you do as well as you thought you should or would? Or did you let yourself down like Helena Bonham Carter did by not wearing a dead bird tied to her waist? Leave it in the comments.

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What Had Happened

By the time you are reading this, the Oscars will be over. And if they are not, we will all be counting the minutes until they are. This is by far the saddest day of year, because it means the longest period of time before the next Oscars and since the Oscars are my absolute favorite awards show, I’m going to be in a funk…unless we get into an amazing conversation about what did happen! With that in mind and knowing that I have absolutely no clue what actually happened at the show as I am writing this, I’m going to share some of my wildly fantastical guesses as to what will (or I guess did) happen on the stage.

1. James Franco & Anne Hathaway
James Franco was gorgeous and Anne Hathaway was elegant and multi-outfitted. But the report doesn’t end there. They were so nervous about their hosting gig, that they did shots of that mixture Rachel Berry served on Glee. After getting dutifully sloshed, they staggered about the stage and ended up making out with each other on a lark. James Franco also declared his undying love for that Adam who blogs Cocky & Rude.  Anne Hathaway felt snubbed so she sat at the end of the stage and pouted.

2. Politics
Celebrities love to take their moment in front of the camera to plug their current political cause or philanthropic mission. This year’s telecast was no different, but they were particularly awkward. Jeff Bridges’ declaration of death to all the tasty animals was simultaneously hilarious and off-putting. It also made Susan Sarandon’s pledge to get an abortion on live tv to protest decreased funding for Planned Parenthood seem a bit less creepy. However, Jack Nicholson’s offer to knock her up was quite crude.

3. The Outfits
Everyone always writes about what the ladies wore and how could you not. Some of those garments were pretty scandalous. But I want to write about what the men wore. I particularly found the standard black tuxedo that 99.9% of the dudes wore to be very boring. Get it together men! Next year I want to see at least one of you dressed by Lady Gaga, which will probably mean a suit of semi-inflated condoms splattered with calf’s blood.

4. The Musical Performances
Normally I’m grateful for my mute button during the song performances, but this year I was surprised. Gwyneth Paltrow’s plan to dominate every form of media continued with her performance of that song from that country music movie no one saw. It was delightful to watch. The real shocker occurred when perennial nominee Randy Newman performed his songs from Toy Story 3. I’m sure the Pixar producers were shocked to see the 67 year old man do a striptease to “We Belong Together.” Helen Mirren, however, seemed to be very into it.

Now that you know what I thought was going to happen as well as what really happened, tell me which you think you would enjoy more? Sure I love watching the Oscars, but I think they need to get a bit more wild. Let them blame on the alcohol.

And The Elimination Goes To…

It’s noon, and it’s time to eliminate one of the remaining two of today’s Biggest Cock & Rudest Loser 2 contestants.  Today we’ll say goodbye to one half of a couple:

Adam

Mr. Sombrero

But before we reveal this week’s eliminated contestant, here’s a musical selection for you to enjoy (which was selected by this week’s eliminated contestant).

Please enjoy I Want To Be Evil, by Giant Jr. vs. Eartha Kitt:

And now, the contestant eliminated from BC&RL2 this week is…

Mr. Sombrero!

We’ll all miss you, Mr. Sombrero!

This means that Adam is safe from elimination this week.

But don’t eat too many onions, Mr. Sombrero — you still have a chance to win. This year we’ll be awarding our Rudest Loser prize to the eliminated player that loses the most weight. Keep working hard to drop some pounds, and we’ll check back in with you on April 7th!

And The Elimination Goes To…

It’s that day again — the one that we all dread.  Elimination day is upon us, and we will say goodbye to one of our bottom three Biggest Cock & Rudest Loser 2 players by the end of the day.  Who’s in danger of leaving the contest?

Adam

FDot

Mr. Sombrero

But before we reveal the first safe player of the week, here’s a musical selection for you to enjoy.

Please enjoy Bruno Mars’ Grenade

 

And now, without further ado, the first player safe from elimination this week is…

FDot!

That means that either Adam or Mr. Sombrero will be eliminated from the game at Noon today!

C&R Oscar Picks: Part Two

Yesterday you learned that Mikey & Adam agreed on a lot of their Oscar picks. Will they do the same when we look at their picks for the more popular categories? Let’s find out…

Best Foreign Language Film

Adam: While Biutiful was fantastic, I’m going to choose Dogtooth. The sheer creepiness of Dogtooth still sticks with me.  And I’m a sucker for zombies.

Mikey: I didn’t see any of these movies, but I like Denmark because they are really liberal.  I’m gonna go with their movie In a Better World.

Readers: 50% of the readers voted for Biutiful.

Best Animated Feature

Mikey: Toy Story 3 was better than the previous two movies and was one of the best movies of the year.  It stands no chance of losing this award.

Adam: I still haven’t seen The Illusionist, but Toy Story 3 just felt like it was missing something for me.  I LOVED How To Train Your Dragon, so that’s my pick for the win.

Readers: Toy Story 3 won an overwhelming majority.

Best Original & Adapted Screenplay

Mikey:Aaron Sorkin is my homeboy…so he will walk and talk his way up to the podium and collect his very first Oscar for The Social Network.  And anyone who can write in the Queen’s English and make him stutter and stammer his way into our hearts deserves to win.  And The King’s Speech will.

Adam: I’ve seen all of the movies in these two categories, and while most of them were impressive, I was especially impressed with the writing in 127 Hours, The Social Network, True Grit, and The King’s Speech. Which will win?  My money’s on The Social Network and The King’s Speech.

Readers: The readers agree, with most picking The Social Network and The King’s Speech.

Best Director

Mikey: Years in the making, David Fincher has slowly made his way to the upper echelons of the industry.  His talent and connections will be rewarded with this Oscar for The Social Network, over The King’s Speech‘s Tom Hooper’s objections of course.

Adam: Who should win?  I’d give it to the Black Swan‘s Darren Aronofsky.  But who will win?  I’ll follow the buzz and go with The Social Network’s David Fincher.

Readers: 50% of the readers chose The Social Network‘s David Fincher.

Best Supporting Actor & Actress

Adam: Jackie Weaver was great in Animal Kingdom, but Hailee Steinfeld’s gruff little girl in True Grit will win the prize.  As for the boys, I’d love to see Jeremy Renner (The Town) or Geoffrey Rush (The King’s Speech) take the prize.  And I don’t even know how John Hawkes (Winter’s Bone) made it onto this list.  But I’ll side with the majority of the professional predictors and pick the Christian Bale, who played a creepy thin drug addict in The Fighter.

Mikey: Supporting Actress is the tightest race of the top categories, but Hailee Steinfeld’s nomination for True Grit will be rewarded because she’s really the lead actress. Also her campaign ads aren’t skanky like Melissa Leo’s (The Fighter). I haven’t seen The Fighter, but from what I’ve heard Christian Bale becomes his character to a frightening degree.  Voters like that.  So he will knock out the competition.

Readers: The majority of the readers picked Melissa Leo and Christian Bale, for their supporting turns in The Fighter.

Best Actor & Actress

Mikey: Colin should have won last year and he will get his revenge on Jeff Bridges by doing so this year.  Long live the King.  And if Natalie Portman (Black Swan) doesn’t win this award it would be a crime.  Not that Annette Bening (The Kids Are All Right) knows anything about that kind of crime…  In the end, I think that Natalie’s stunning  performance during which she is almost entirely on screen will triumph.  Sorry lezzies.

Adam: While I’d LLOOVVEE to see Oscar Host, James Franco win the statue for his amazing performance in 127 Hours, I can’t help but vote for Colin Firth’s performance in The King’s Speech.  But if it wasn’t for the stammer…  For Best Actress, there’s no choice that deserves it more than Natalie Portman (Black Swan).  Her performance was truly remarkable.

Readers: Natalie Portman (Black Swan) and Colin Firth (The King’s Speech) won the majority.

Best Picture

Mikey: The King’s Speech has become the odds on favorite to win and it will live up to its name.  It is the kind of picture that the Academy loves to reward and for good reason.

Adam: Of course The King’s Speech will win.  But I’d like to recognize a few of the other movies, by ranking the ten in my list of deservedness.  10. Toy Story 3, 9. The Kids Are All Right, 8. The Fighter, 7. The Social Network, 6. True Grit, 5. Inception, 4. Black Swan, 3. The King’s Speech, 2. Dogtooth, 1. 127 Hours!  That’s right, 127 Hours was my favorite movie of the year! And the snorey, crap-fest Winter’s Bone didn’t even place.  Blechk!

Readers: Nearly all the contestants chose The King’s Speech for the prize!

EXPOSED: The Truth About Craig (continued…)

Craig sent me this lovely doodle last night.  It looks like his streak of unprovoked meanness is continuing.
Don’t forget to vote in the latest BCRL Elimination… ((cries))

C&R Oscar Picks: Part One

The Oscars are upon us and you have bided your breath waiting to find out  what the true experts have to say about the slate of nominees.  And just who are these experts?  Probably the people that work for Entertainment Weekly, Entertainment Tonight, Extra, and Access Hollywood.  Who will you have to settle for?  None other than your favorite bloggers: Adam & Mikey.  We’ve also checked out all of your contest entries, so we’ll also toss your opinion into the mix.  Here are the C&R picks for who will win:

The Shorts: Live Action, Animated & Documentary

Mikey: Who should win Best Live Action Short? I have no clue who should win this award because I have seen none of them.  However, I can tell you that The Confession will win.  I base this on the fact that it comes alphabetically first on the list of nominees.

Adam: So far I’m voting for The Confession as well.  It’s the film that’s getting the most buzz, and the one short that I have seen, Wish 143 was sweet but underwhelming.

Readers: C&R ballots awarded a tie to The Confession & The Crush.

Mikey: Who should win Best Animated Short?  The Gruffalo.  Who will win?  The Gruffalo.  Why?  Cuz that name is adorable and it is British.  Ride the Wave!

Adam: I also picked The Gruffalo.

Readers: Our voters chose The Gruffalo with an overwhelming majority!

Mikey: This pick is tough (cuz…I’m pretending I know what the hell I’m saying), but I feel confident that  Killing in the Name will win and in fact should win this award.  Death is attractive to rich old celebs.

Adam: I also picked Killing in the Name because my IMDB list said that the winner would be “Nominees TBD.”  I thought it’d be funny to see TBD take the stage.

Readers: The majority of balloteers also found death sexy….and gave the award to Killing in the Name.

Best Documentary Feature

Adam: I’ve heard that Restrepo is getting a lot of buzz, but I didn’t love it.  I can appreciate that it’s sad and timely (it’s about the war in Afghanistan), but I thoroughly enjoyed Exit Through The Gift Shop.  Plus I’d love to see what happens if Banksy takes the stage.

Mikey: The Banksy connection and the perpetual playing on streaming Netflix aside, my money is on the Inside Job since Academy voters love to shame politicians and capitalists, to which they bare little to no  resemblance.

Readers: Our voters voted for Banksy and chose Exit Through the Gift Shop.

Best Visual Effects

Adam: I’m voting that Inception will snatch up a bunch of the lesser awards because it won’t fare well in the major categories.

Mikey: The only competition that Inception has in this category is Alice in Wonderland, which can’t even hold its own.  Inception is a Visual Effects movie and deserves this award without a doubt.

Readers: C&R voters unanimously awarded this Oscar to Inception too.

Best Sound Mixing & Sound Editing

Mikey: I’m sure there is some nerd out there who can tell me the difference between these two. I don’t really care because in the end they are both going to Inception.

Adam: Agreed: Inception.

Readers: Our Ballots also show that 75% of voters will choose Inception.

Best Original Score & Original Song

Mikey: I hate the original song category. An obvious ploy to get viewers, but no one is going to tune in to see Gwyneth Paltrow sing again…so my money is ‘If I Rise’ from 127 Hours.

Adam: I disagree that’s it’s a ploy to get voters (because I can’t really remember any view draws in recent years), but I agree with ‘If I Rise’ from 127 Hours. But to be honest, I only voted for it because I assumed that it was the song from the trailer.  I was wrong.

Readers: Our panel of balloteering balloters seem to not want to hear Randy Newman or Gwyneth sing…so they went for If I Rise as well.

Mikey: The musical score can be as important as the acting in a movie, which is why this year’s pool of musical scores might be one the most competitive races of the night.   I think that The King’s Speech’s score will find it’s way to the podium by riding a wave of support for the movie, which is a shame because The Social Network’s is the most groundbreaking and memorable of the bunch.

Adam: My money’s on The Social Network. That’s an expression … I didn’t really bet money.

Readers: The survey says… The Social Network.

Best Makeup, Costume Design & Art Direction

Mikey: Makeup is a cute category.  But you can always tell who will win by knowing how much makeup was used in the film.  Obviously the amount of latex used in making The Wolfman will be rewarded.

Readers: Voters chose The Wolfman…but probably because they are hot for Benicio.

Adam: Ewww, Mikey wrote that — and Benicio is gross.  Do people actually find him attractive?  Blechk.  I didn’t see Barney’s Version or The Way-Back, and although I thought it was a crappy movie, I’m voting for The Wolfman.

Mikey: What factors can you rely on to know who will win Costume Design?  Glamour, Period Setting, Extravagance and Women. Alice in Wonderland has this perfect storm and has the award all sewn up. Art Direction is just like Costumes, but less clothes and more walls and shit.  That’s why Alice also wins because it had all that and bag of crazy Johnny Depp.

Adam: Alice in Wonderland was breathtakingly beautiful.  The rest of the nominated movies shined in these categories, but not as brightly as Alice in Wonderland.

Readers: Most of the readers agreed, with a majority picking Alice.

Best Editing & Best Cinematography

Adam: The Social Network flew through its lengthy script with ease.  With the exception of 127 Hours, none of the other nominees stand a chance.  I’m going with The Social Network.

Mikey: For jumping seamless through time, The Social Network should and will walk away with the award this year.  For Best Cinematography, my vote is for True Grit. The Academy has to prove that it gave True Grit a bunch of nominations for a reason.  That’s why they’ll give True Grit the Cinematography award, which they all kinda understand, but don’t really care about.

Adam: They don’t care about it?  I’d care about if I won the award.  I feel like this award could go to The King’s Speech, but I have a feeling it will go to True Grit as well.  That’s my pick.

Readers: The readers were spread pretty evenly in these two categories.  The Social Network leads Editing and True Grit leads Cinematography, but not by very much.


Check back tomorrow for the rest of our Oscar picks!

 

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